A no snooping weekend for me!

[Grace_O]

Jumpy requires physical activity IMO. It's the only thng I've found that can calm those nerves.

What are your plans for tonight?

[doa180]

Amen!

[doa180]

Just got off the phone with the kids. I told S he could hang up, and I heard him tell W. It sounded like she said I didn't want to talk to him anyway... Maybe not though - the kids were awfully whiny. Now I want to find an excuse to call or text...

[doa180]

No plans for tonite. Other than maybe grocery store. What fun!

[doa180]

wnating to call or text W so bad... i don't want her to be mad at me. Isn't that an odd way to feel in all of this?

[doa180]

I compromised with myself on this and the christmas issue. I texted her that I had to run to a meeting earlier (did not apoligize) and said that there have been changes regarding Christmas and that I wouild like to talk to her tonite about them.

I thought if she was mad because I ddin't talk to her she would see that I was busy, and if she didn't no big deal.

I should be called "THE RATIONALIZER" :-)

[MariS]

doa180

My apology for not checking in sooner....pop over to my stitch and you will see why. Ugh!

Either way, I am proud to read that did not give W a holiday guilt trip. That was a HUGE step for you! Big pat on the back for you....

I understand what you mean by wearing your wedding ring. My WAH-MLCer hasn't worn his in over 2yrs (out of state A, seperation, friend/OW A) To me it is my choice and what makes me feel comfortable. Yeah, I would like WAH-MLCer to wear his, but he has to deal w/his demon's first. So does your W...

As for your W seeking employment, I agree w/Jeanett1120. This is a step for your W to posibbly finally grow up and mature. My WAH-MLCer has never really had a 9-5 job and I wish he did, so he might value family time more and not say he is bored, with nothing to do. Keep thinking this is a opportunity for W to grow and learn more about herself and who she is.

I completely understand you also not wanting to have a talk w/kids either...

Yes, continually remember that the OM is also exerting pressure on W. By keeping this in mind, it will also keep us in check from anger issues, verbal assults, name blaming, etc. We do not want to give the WAS any more reason to pull away further. Let the other person do that. (Classic DBing)

It IS hard to maintain that balance and try to present an "As If" everything is normal at the same time provide a warm loving environment for the WAS to return to. BUT, if that is what you have sought deep down inside of you to do, then by golly, it can be done.

Use us, the bb as your sounding board to help you stay the course...

Sending you your "Atta Boys" and PMA!

[doa180]

Thanks -- Although I did end up blowing it a bit...


see... (I started a new thread not knowing better)

might have made a mistake

above

[MariS]

doa180

You didn't blow it - just created a speed bump.

Now, did you actually start a new thread? If so, which one is it, so I can keep up.

Sending you PMA and your Atta Boys!

[doa180]

Thanks. I don't know how to link to it. It is "might have made a mistake"