Well I've been here nearly a year now. I wish I was posting my own success story today unfortunately that's not the case. But I will be at some point!
A bit of background first, just before Thanksgiving 2006 I discovered my wife had retained an attorney in an effort to see how quickly she could get a divorce. Thankfully NC has a 12 month waiting period! I discovered this at work(my wife and I worked together at the time) and I had a complete breakdown. Luckily a good friend discovered me before anyone saw me. She hustled me off to her office and sat, listened to me and was a superb friend.
As I gain my composure she began to share her own story. She was about to leave her husband for pretty much the same reasons my wife was walking out. She just didn't feel love and felt she had given all she could while he just sucked the life and all that he could out of her. She never confessed to me but I suspect she had an emotional affair earlier that year as well but ended it when she realized how damaging to everyone it was.
At that moment I vowed to myself I would not allow her and her husband to become version 2 of my wife and my situation. So she and I began to talk and support one another.
Well fast forward to this week. She and I haven't spoken in many weeks. She contacted me last week to see how I was doing. We chatted and agreed to meet for lunch, something we had done occasionally as coworkers and as friends supporting one another.
At lunch earlier this week she told me how she and her husband were doing and to my surprise they were doing a great deal better. He's come around a good bit and they are both dedicated to each other and their marriage. While she realized the good and positive things he was doing. He wasn't always sucking it in but giving too. They have plenty of issues still to work through but are doing so in a health and combined way. They recently went on a vacation without the kids and during that time were able to continue to reconnect and rebuild their marriage. She told me no their marriage isn't perfect, far from it but now it's solidly rooted in love.
So yes it can happen, when our marriages are at dark times, when all seems lost, it can be found again, rebuilt and rebuilt even better!!
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
you! I was fooled for a moment, but hopefully, you will post your own story someday
Glad it work out for her, it is amazing how many divorces there are outthere, looking at my own family, pretty much all my uncles/aunts from my dad's side (including him) divorced.
Here is to another day!
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
Great story. Sometimes though people dig such a huge hole such as my H I think there is no coming back.
My mom also had success this year and for that I am very happy! She and her companion of 21 years are back together for two months now. It has made a real improvement in her life. She never snooped, went dark, stayed positive, dated other men, accepted that he would date other women, never questioned his MLC, he spent a lot of his money, she let it go which is a huge 180. They are together only half the week as they are Piecing still so they are in there separate living spaces the other days but they talk on the phone all the time like teenagers in love again. It is really great to see that a separation could actually improve a R!
BTW, she said there is no way my H would ever comeback to me. She said she knew the difference between her partner and my H. She said there was always a little waffling on her partner's part but that my H went plumb crazy and burnt all bridges to a crisp way beyond a normal MLC more like a social suicide.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
