I happened to come across something you posted on the Retro v Counseling thread, and I just really felt I had to comment:
Quote:
Found out that my W has an appt with the OBgyn this wednesday, and I saw him at a bball game friday and talked to him at length about W. He is going to talk to her about menopause and depression, and he hopes to get her on some medication that may help with the hormones and mood swings. We have known him for a number of years, and he mentioned that he sees many W come to him with hormone problems and problems with depression.
I happen to work in the healthcare field (administration) and this is a direct violation of the HIPAA law. Your W's healthcare providers should never, ever, under any circumstances, discuss your W's health care business with you or anyone else, unless there is release signed by your W stating that it's okay to do so. And typically, that does not include conversation -- just medical records release.
Your wife could file charges and perhaps sue her OBGyn over this. I'd suggest you keep this discussion to yourself and not have any further conversations like that with any of her healthcare providers, including any C's she may be seeing independently.
IAchild, been away from these boards for a few weeks, b/c i get very depressed when read all this stuff. I understand your concern on hipaa. You and I both know that the intent of this law was for people on the outside to not have access to our records. Discussions on menopause, etc., are part of the annual checkup. I have all kinds of concerns for my W, and if I cant talk to a doctor about them, WHAT THE HELL GOOD IS ANYTHING! NO WONDER THIS WORLD IS SCREWED UP! WE CANT EVEN TALK ABOUT OUR SPOUSES HEALTH TO A DOCTOR. MAYBE THIS WILL ALL BE OK AFTER GLOBAL WARMING MELTS THE POLAR ICE CAPS AND WE ALL DROWN! Sorry, but i had to let off some steam. My holidays sucked to say the least. My W is having an affair, files for D, and I'm the SOB. All of a sudden, most of her family wont talk to me let alone look at me. They had their christmas on sunday the 23rd, and i wasnt invited. Christmas eve my W and D20 and S18 were invited to a mutual friends open house, and of course I'm not invited. Spent christmas day at my brothers, and my S was there at least of couple of hours. My D was there to eat, but had to go to boyfriends for their holiday. Then to top it off, my W and kids went to SIL's that night and again it is hard when I only saw them a few hours. W has had the whole week off, and it is very hard to be in the house with her. She spends most of her waking hours on that damn computer, and of course when i walk into the room, she is switching screens. She did bring me coffee on christmas morning, and was kinda nice, but i just think she felt the whole guilt thing. I hav e been continuing to give her space, and have been tying to gal, but around the holidays, it is hard to find friends that are not busy with their own families. She has been telling me when she is going out, and has been trying to talk about whatever, but I am really having a hard time with this. I thought that i was doing a good job at detaching over the last few months, but i guess i am now doing a lousy job. I made the mistake today of looking at her cell phone when she was in the shower, and i discovered that the OM has a new number. Maybe i was supposed to find that out, as all the stuff i have on her(cell phone records, and emails) i am keeping in case this gets to D. I am torn as to how to proceed. I dont know that i can live in the same house much longer. L tells me not to move out, that I would be abandoning the family if i do, and will not have any chance at getting the house. While i was checking the cell phone today, I found text messages from the OM about how he loves her, etc. W is living a double life, as she is very good at doing her job and coming across to family that she is ok. I was upset yesterday when W brought home a calendar that one of the relatives puts together of the great grandchildren of W grandmother(she is 94). The calendar has pictures of kids (mine included) on each month and it also notes the birthdays of all the people in the family. When i got to the month of my birthday, my name is not there. Kind of pisses me off that this has only been going on for six months or so, and suddenly I am nonexistent! I guess 22 years of marriage doesnt mean s--t. Sorry, i know that i havent been doing the DB very well lately, but the holidays just make things very hard, especially since i see the W acting like nothing is wrong. Patience my -ss. Still struggling with if i am telling the kids or not. Mentioned to D20 today when we were going to church that i am not on the calendar and that it hurts to see that W's family has written me off the planet. D then asked what i was doing for new years eve. I told her at this point nothing, as most of my friends have plans. May go somewhere to eat. W and kids are invited to SisterIL's. Yeah, W has the best of both worlds. Gotta go, going to see nephew before he heads back home tommorrow.
