Yes Ladies SD is right Dr. Atkins did fall hit his head and die of a clot. As much ads the media would like people to think there was some big thing with his diet, there wasn't.
I feel awesome when im'e on the diet too. now i just have to stay in tune with it and make' it a life change.
Nikki, I know you feel uncomfortable right now with ML but, If you decide to let H initiate and then do what i suggested and get up right after say thanks and walk out. Give him a reality check. he'll wonder im'e sure. And actually a DB coach told me that one.
JAK
You don't get to choose how you're going to die. Or when, you can only decide how you're going to live now. ~Joan Baez
SD - ohh that's right! Thanks for clarifying. I remember he had some kind of heart problem that he'd had all his life that was totally not diet related. I forgot that wasn't how he died and that he had hit his head.
Agree, I feel a ton better when I follow the diet strictly.
On the ML, Hmm that's a good rule, I think. And yeah, going to insist on condoms... which sucks (really doesn't feel the same!), but I think that's the only way to consider ML and not be stupid about it. Jak - definitely like the thanks and walk out idea!!
TB (still love the nickname!) was in full effect last night. Got home really late, acting odd and pretty much baiting me to ask where he was, then giving me evasive answers. grr. I took the bait for a couple minutes then recognized what was going on and walked away.
On a positive note, got my room cleared out so it's ready for furniture if I can ever get ahold of the people. If they don't call me back today I'm disputing the charge and will go somewhere else.
I also had forgotten that the shower in there is all torn apart... there's no shower head and I'm not even sure what all needs to be fixed in there. Will try to figure it out though. Worst case scenario I can use the other shower for now.
My "it's the weekend" anxiety is back again - trying to fight it off. I forgot about this from before, if I don't have plans I get all this anxiety because my heart wants plans w/H and my head knows better. I do much better when I actively plan ahead and have things scheduled to do.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
My "it's the weekend" anxiety is back again - trying to fight it off. I do much better when I actively plan ahead and have things scheduled to do.
Seems like you have the answer in your back pocket. Schedule something. And if you can't find an activity, go to a movie, go to the store and get the things to fix up the other bathroom. Make that yours as well as the room.
Me: 41 H: 42 Married: 13Y, together 24 Kids: S11, S9, D6 Bomb: 7/11/06, now piecing
Don't get yourself figure-eighted around your axle and H's axle with that MLC stuff. FWIW, I don't think that model is very helpful for very many people and it can take you to a place that is pretty condescending/invalidating toward H and keep you stuck there.
Sex -- I can't even believe you are having unprotected sex. Cannot even believe it. Stop it. Go to the doctor. Get tested. Jeez. If you don't like sex with condoms, then don't have it, but don't have unprotected sex either. BTW, condoms will not protect you against herpes.
Great news on the legal front. I'm so happy you are getting empowered here, great job!
How about you go away for the weekend again? Pack a bag, hop in the car, have an adventure, and leave your lingerie drawer open and obviously pawed through looking for stuff. If money is a concern, trust me, you can have an equally wonderful time at a hostel as at a pricey hotel.
Care - thanks! Yep, planning a movie and working on my room, for sure. Made lunch plans for Sunday too. Just need to remember to do that consistently instead of getting to Friday and getting that anxious feeling.
OT I'm sorry - you lost me on the "figure eighted" and the MLC thing... can you clarify/elaborate?
As to the sex - yeah, I know. Dumb on my part (and too trusting of someone who I should NOT trust right now). Already have an appt for my annual exam in a couple of weeks so I'm going to ask her to test me then. In good news, I heard back from my doc and I do have a nasty bladder infection but it's nothing H-related.
Thanks for the weekend ideas, but I'm actually pretty happy to be home this weekend. I just made lunch plans w/my dad and sis for Sunday, so that's one thing down. But H is going to be gone almost all weekend (yes, for some reason he's telling me all about his plans, and it's all stuff with family or friends and all easily verifiable if I was so inclined). So I'm excited to have the house to myself for awhile, and also have some good time to work on my room. He'll be home at night I think, but gone all day both days. Woo hoo!
Thank you for the dogfriendly link! I'm saving it to my favorites for next time I DO want a weekend away.
Hope you have a good weekend as well!
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Ohhh! Got it, thanks. I didn't know that. I'm pretty done analyzing, predicting, etc. and don't want to get sucked back into that, for sure. Maybe I need to rethink where my new "home" here will be.
Is there somewhere else you think is more appropriate for me to post?
I think "We're Separated" is really where I should be, but feel a bit odd jumping in there when we're in the same house.
(incidentally.. I realize where I post doesn't matter as much as my attitude etc.. But I do tend to read where I post, so I figure I should be on the forum where I'm going to read the healthiest advice on other threads too)
Last edited by NikkiB; 11/02/0706:29 PM.
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
Well, an odd but interesting night so far - and mostly a good one, so YAY for that! Went shopping after work to look for stuff for my room - not necessarily buy yet, just get ideas.
I was pretty far from home and the furniture people finally call back - to tell me they are AT MY HOUSE and wondering where I am. I swear, what is it with me lately and dealing with the most unprofessional possible people? I told the guy "Well no one ever called to tell me if or when you were even coming so no, I'm not there." (meanwhile I'm freaking out that H may show up while the guy is trying to deliver furniture that H knows nothing about). The guy said "Ok bye" and I said "WAIT! Can I schedule a time or something?" He said no that I had to call "the store" and hung up on me. uuugh!! I have no idea who this guy is, how he's related to "the store", or what the deal is. Will call the place I bought it from tomorrow and see if I can figure it out.
So after that I continued to wander the home decor store and was getting kind of frustrated because I saw stuff I felt like I 'should' like but nothing was really jumping out at me. Then out of nowhere, I saw this placemat that I really liked. How can a $5 placemat suddenly inspire a room? I dunno, but it did. I went "This is it!! Island breeze, that's my room." So I am embracing the carpet and calling it lush tropical green , and going with a sort of subdued tropical kind of theme. Greens, blues, all really natural colors. Maybe a yellow (sun type color) for the walls... or a beige, but the more I think about it a yellow may work. Still unsure on that. I didn't buy much yet but got a ton of ideas. I don't want to make it cheesy (easy to do with "tropical" things), but just tranquil.
I could even do the bathroom kinda over the top bright/tropical if I wanted to... I've always thought that'd be kinda fun, but still thinking about that. I'm trying to be practical, realizing that whatever I put in there may be in the only bathroom wherever I end up... so not sure yet. I'll share pics of the two bathroom "styles" I'm looking at - feedback is welcome!
When I got home H was here with a couple of his guy friends and was just leaving. Apparently going away overnight w/them. I told him/them to have fun (and secretly thought WOO HOO house to myself!). Just then his cell phone started going nuts w/text messages. I'm not sure if this was good, bad, or what, but I just said "Seriously??? GROW UP!" and walked away. From the other room I could hear his two friends bust up laughing and harassing the heck out of him.. get the feeling maybe they had already been teasing him about it. These are the only "older" (as in known more than 3 years) friends he's hung out with in ages so I think it was probably a bit of a wake up call, to be around people his age as opposed to all the early 20's people he works with.
After that H followed me to give me a hug and kiss before leaving, that surprised me. He also said in a funny tone "I won't do anything bad" - his friend shot back with "Oh, don't worry, I will!" (this friend has kinda the "bad boy" image so it totally made sense and was funny). Then the same guy says to me "Oh and don't worry, we'll bring him back in one piece" [pause for about 5 seconds] "well, if you want us to." That cracked me up.
After they left I set up my fountain and looked around my new room more. Realized the carpet was NASTY - we never clean it even when we do the rest of the house, so I did a really thorough steam clean. It looks and smells really nice now!! Still dark green but as I mentioned, trying to embrace the color.
I tried to fix the shower but it is really a mess. I got all the right parts, I think, but I can't for the life of me fix the pipe that comes from the wall out into the shower. I understand what's wrong and I can see that it needs to be moved about 1/4 turn, but it will not budge AT ALL (it's basically pointing out from the shower into the bathroom, and won't move either direction). I may bring it up to H the same time as I mention the room and just ask if he's willing to help - he's the one who got it all screwy like that so I'm hoping he knows how to fix it. I really wanted to do it myself but I honestly can't, and don't want to pay a plumber to come fix it when H can probably do it very quickly. I can figure out some kind of "trade" I think to make it fair and more of a "friends" or even "room mates" type of thing.
So anyway... here are a few pics of my "sanctuary in the making" - any suggestions are great!!
Close up of my fountain and candle: http://s7.photobucket.com/albums/y258/DeltaDog2/Sanctuary/?action=view¤t=DSC03237.jpg The fountain is especially cool because my dad and I made these together in a class many years ago, and I just dug it out of storage.. I also added a stone inside the "pool" part of it that says "Believe" that I picked up on my Sonoma trip. The white glare from the nightstand top is just from the camera - it's a mostly clear table cover, just to protect the wood. The brown part is the bamboo placemat I mentioned earlier.
And last but not least.. the two bathroom motifs I was looking at.
Thanks again all for your support. Feeling pretty peaceful tonight and it feels darn good.
(in case this locks.. I'll probably finish out my new thread in MLC, but probably move to Separated after that).
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
I could see he could be cute...without the weird expression on his face... musta caught him talking. or he likes to pretend he's holding a cigarette in his mouth.
The pumpkins looked fun!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
on the yellow.... that is a really good color to choose if you want to be uplifted in your room. I think if you research colors and moods, you'd find that yellow makes people in better moods, or happier... I could have the wrong adjectives. I think red coincides with more agression. It's been a LONG time since I read about that though.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
But I really do think it's cute, just afraid it might be TOO 'cute.' 