Hey girlie.... I hate it when you disappear like this!
Check in please. Just so you know.... you don't always have to have some big breakthrough or some big backslide to report. I am sure that I'm not alone in feeling that it's just good to talk with you. Your candor is so freaking refreshing and never fails to put a smile on my face.
Things have been really tough for awhile for you, I know, and I pray for you often.... keep a firm grasp on your faith Amy and trust God to fill your heart with hope. You've been on the rollercoaster for such a long time.... how 'bout hopping off for awhile? Is there anything that you've wanted to explore that has nothing at all to do with Jeff ot the kids or the whole situation? Take a breather for just you!!! You deserve it.
just wanted to say I'm missin your smart@$$ around here!
holla back girl! .... how lame was that? I'm way too old to try being hip!
~lost
Psa 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
I'm not standing for my marriage anymore. I am not finding it possible to stand in the gap for my husband either. I am trying to get my head around the idea that all really was lost and it is time for me to move on now. It's not easy because I remember when things were good and we weren't adversaries. But that was back when I was naive and I did not see things like I see them now. He is an active (albeit functioning) alcoholic. I do not trust him anymore. I worry about him putting D11 in the truck. He has no discretion whatsoever. Not regarding the things he says in front of her, or as far as establishing boundaries, making her responsible, etc...The final straw, the eye-opener, occured a few nights ago. He told me hatefully that HE is raising her...blah, blah, blah....I snapped and told him how dare he say that to me! He's had her for 9 months and I raised her FOR TEN YEARS. Something just turned off in me. I hate him for turning her into his enabler. I hate him for being a coward. I hate him because he is turning her into the person that I used to be. One that has no idea how to take care of herself, no sense of responsibility or self-discipline, oblivious to real life.
This will only get worse from here and there are no miracles coming.
I see no reason to let it play out on this board, though, so I do not plan to post anymore.
Thanks for being my friend, L-n-F. I appreciate it.
I'm sorry things have taken this bad turn. You do what you know is best for you and your family. But, please don't stop praying for strength and grace to deal with whatever plan God has in store. You have much support here whenever you need it. Don't disappear completely... okay?
My email is k.lee813@gmail.com if you want to talk off the board... anytime. My prayers are with you.
~lost
Psa 51:10 Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
Amy, I wish there was something I could say to make this a little easier for you. Alchol is our families worst enemy. There is nothing we can do about that but make darn sure we don't drag our kids down the same path that our H are on. They need to self destruct on their own. Please try to go back to school,as you have mentioned you wanted to do but never had the strength. I know it is hard to do financially and physically but think about taking one class. It will help you build yourself back up. I am always here for you just as you have been for me through this process. I know I could not have made it this far without people like you. Please let me know when you are having a "down" day cause i know how you feel. I will never forget you, and yes I still read your last post to me daily...sometimes more than once. You should see the folded up 1 thousand times paper in my purse. It is my strength when I lose mine. We have to see it for what it is and that is that they are selfish alcholic's.....and we are better than that!!!!
You know you were a huge part of MY marriage restoration.....and it breaks my heart to see you at this place. By the grace of our almighty God you were rescued from the pit....and I know that YOU know deep down in your heart that He can do the same thing for your H...and your marriage. I am continuing to pray for that miracle!
Praising God Daily, Remaining "FaithfulH" Me: 62 W: 62 D:33 S:30 & 31 Married: 40 Years BD: Sep 2006 Piecing: May 2007 2nd BD: May 2014 Working On It: Today
There comes a time when you must step down from standing for your marriage and stand for you children. Who's to say that this "mixin it up a bit" will not open the eyes of he who chooses to not see? This is a huge change of direction for you and I'm sure you put alot of thought into this before taking the 180. Follow your gut instinct it will not steer you wrong sweets! Like I said.....maybe this is whats needed at this point of the journey. Nothing like a good ole wake up call! Hell, you've had hundreds....he needs one and your children need a positive roll model.
{{{Hugs}}}
Jeanette
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!