My d was final a few weeks ago dispite my DB efforts over the last year. I stuck with the DB principles and while I feel good about my actions and not buring any bridges, it made no difference in the present. Who knows what time will bring. I hope her affair ends and she trys to at least communicate with me some how. Card, phone call or whatever. I have GAL and am seeing someone casually but am really stuck on her. Any stories of reuniting out there?
Hi Talley - just wanted to let you know that I also have an interest in your question and it seems my sitch is similar to yours, though I am not divorced just yet. I have read that between 6-14% of divorces end up getting remarried.
I hope the best for you.
Me: 48 Ex-W: 45 M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93 Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06 OM Separated: mid-Feb '07 Divorced mid-July '08 One daughter - 28 XW living w/OM
the stars must be aligned or something...I logged into this forum specifically planning to check if anyone had posted about reuniting.
Wonder if it is the time of year, that several of us are thinking along these same lines.
Hugs. AH
They certaintly are AH.....this sucks hon. Your a strong woman, I am a stong woman. This has certaintly brought me to my knees with a weight unequal to anything I've ever encountered before.
Cheers darling......
Jeanette
Change the Policy. Allow PM's Free all of us.
Also some new and improved emoticons would be nice!
I am going to try and send a card to my wife for her bday which is Nov 1st. That would be the first contact from me since our d was final in late August.
More similarities - my stbx's bd is 10/31. I have never put much stock in the whole horoscope thing.
I guess it is natural to wonder about a reconciliation, and am glad to see there are others with similar thoughts. I would welcome a sincere attempt from her, but I do not think she is at that point.
I can't help but think that she will one day regret her decision to leave.
Me: 48 Ex-W: 45 M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93 Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06 OM Separated: mid-Feb '07 Divorced mid-July '08 One daughter - 28 XW living w/OM
They certaintly are AH.....this sucks hon. Your a strong woman, I am a stong woman. This has certaintly brought me to my knees with a weight unequal to anything I've ever encountered before.
Jeanette - I too can relate to your comment. It has been 7+ months since she moved out and I still get sad every day at least once. I am GALing and try to have a PMA, but for me I have lost my best friend of the last 13+ years and the mother of my daughter. Oh well - onward and upward!
Me: 48 Ex-W: 45 M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93 Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06 OM Separated: mid-Feb '07 Divorced mid-July '08 One daughter - 28 XW living w/OM
I believe my W will also regret her decision too. I see folks with problems so much bigger than mine, and they are still married. My W has made a life of running from problems instead of working on them. Nothing is her fault. Problem for me is that because I really believe I think she will regret it, I can't seem to let go. If I could I would love to show her parents all the email lies she told me and make sure they knew that this wonderful guy she is now with played a big role in breaking up a family and a marriage. And that her perfect daughter had an affair. But I will keep on dbing i guess.
I guess I too can not let go in part because I believe she will have regrets. Also, our problems are not insurmountable in my opinion. We have a large credit card balance that can be worked down, but otherwise there is no physical or emotional abuse, addiction, unfaithfulness on my part or any other reasons for this action.
She is classic MLC (in my unprofessional opinion), but I simply can not wait the 2-7 years and hope she comes to her senses.
It sounds as if your in-laws believe that you are the bad guy. Too bad. However, I would refrain from showing emails and what not. I made the mistake of opening my big mouth and giving out those kind of details to some people and it got back to my W. She was mad, but realized that while she was wrong in her actions, I was not right in violating her privacy and then divulging those details. We had a meeting and I think everything is clear, but I'm sure that my sharing of information did not help my cause of one day reuniting.
Wishing you the best.
Me: 48 Ex-W: 45 M: Nov '96, together since Oct 93 Bomb: on 10-yr anni - Nov '06 OM Separated: mid-Feb '07 Divorced mid-July '08 One daughter - 28 XW living w/OM
If it gives you any hope, I reconciled with my wife after being divorced about 7 months. But I saw her frequently after separation and divorce so it wasn't quite the same as the other situations described here. I'm not sure what kind of hope there is if you go 6-7 months without talking. And I don't know about regrets. It may make you feel better, but I really don't know if there are regrets....maybe they are always happy with the decision. Maybe not happy about their life in general, but still happy that they divorced. Who knows?
Me
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
