Other thread locked up. No, I no longer talk to my ex-OM, and quite frankly I'm dead sick of talking about him. The ONLY time I ever even think about him is when people ask me about him on this forum.
For those just joining us here, my situation was thus:
Married H straight out of high school, one son within first year. Lived as swingers for awhile, but H hated it and asked me to stop. I never did. In February of 2006 he was away for a month for training and I met the OM. For almost a year I played the games we all do in an affair, thought I was divorcing my husband to marry OM. I got pregnant with my second son in August of '06 and left my H. Hit rock bottom, did some emotional sobering up and finally saw the affair for the illusion it was. my amazing H and I are rebuilding and the OM has no further hold on me.
I used to take the OM's calls, working through the emotional crap left behind from the affair. Not taking his calls or having any contact with him anymore.
I was the unfaithful wife, and you may all berate me for that stupidity as you wish. I do not deny my stupidity, but at least I recovered. Now I want to help someone else, anyone who wants my take on their situation. You may hate the OW/OM/WAW/WAH, but it can help a lot to know what's really going on with them. I've checked out a few threads, but please drop me a line if you'd like me to view yours.
The grass may be greener, but then again, it may also be astroturf. ~Amy C Brown
Stay strong in your marriage Prodigal Wife. You and your are lucky to have such open communication. It probably makes the R stronger when two people can be honest about their pasts.
I never got addicted to that new R feeling because I actually preferred that safe married feeling. Were you addicted to that new R feeling?
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
Thanks for beign so kind as to sharing your thoughts w/ us!
I have a qestion- here as fo late my H has been iniating a lot of R talk which include his possibilty of coming back and the things he wants changed when he does. SO the other day H talks R and my big mouth as usual bring up OW (actually a comment to his complaint of her) he complained that she is a kitchen "natzi". I guess she is helping him w/ his new healthy diet as per the doc and will not let him have any "bad" stuff whatsoever. So my response has she always been like this? I mean does she eat healthy too? wow she must be really in good shape! H- can we please stop talking about her??????
Its like he can make a comment but dont let me say anything whether good or bad. He tells me to not mention her at all??
Hi Chicki, Sorry for the hijack here, My H's OW is also into extreme dieting and veganism. So my H runs 5 miles per day, sleeps, 4.5 hours per night, and my H weighs about 120 and she is about 85-90 lbs. They are anorexic and emo, which means they wear extremely small fitting clothing and talk bad about America politically. I imagine his new life is a "nightmare" as he calls it. He hates when anyone brings up the OW, especially her age.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
That reminds me of the Woody Allen movie "Husbands and Wives". The WS keeps complaining how the OW has him on an organic tofu diet! He reconcile with his LBS only after she starts dating a hot Liam Neeson.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
Its kinda funny b/c my H will go on a health kick for only a short period of time so I know this natzi thing is getting to him. I guess thas why when he comes over he raids our fridge and says how he misses my spanish cooking even thoguh all that pork really sint good for him. HA! I have one up on OW, my spanish cooking!!
Other thread locked up. No, I no longer talk to my ex-OM, and quite frankly I'm dead sick of talking about him. The ONLY time I ever even think about him is when people ask me about him on this forum.
And when people ask about why you continued to speak with him, you insist on digging your heels in and defending it with rationalization and justification. I bring this up because I believe that when someone refuses to learn from their mistakes, they are destined to repeat them. Based on the fact that you are defending an action which most certainly hurt your husband, you are in danger of doing the same thing again and again.
Its kinda funny b/c my H will go on a health kick for only a short period of time so I know this natzi thing is getting to him. I guess thas why when he comes over he raids our fridge and says how he misses my spanish cooking even thoguh all that pork really sint good for him. HA! I have one up on OW, my spanish cooking!!
My mom says she is 21 and could pass for 16. My H says she is 23 and very "small". Yeah, I did get pangs of disgust picturing my H as a legal pedophile, someone who dates a person who looks like a child but is of legal age to consent. He lurked on her Myspace on my computer and her only three friends were still in high school. I met my H 23 years ago when I was in high school!
Re: Spanish cooking. My H's family is from Madrid. My MIL taught me my H's favorite recipes. I offered to make Portuguese Steak for Father's Day, then I noticed he refused to eat any meals with us. This was before I realized he was having an affair. Turns out he gave up meat to be with her as many of these young emo cult kids are vegans! Oy vey! His family refuses to talk with him. They have cut him off.
Last edited by mkultra; 09/05/0711:53 AM.
Me:38 H:39 MLC M:10 R:23 years D6 S3 Bomb: Easter, 2007 "Every day may not be good, but there's something good in every day."
