It's my birthday, and I've been separated three months--out of the house. I've committed my share of sins, but her MLC is also a big part of what's going on. The posts from Snodderly and others have been so helpful. This board is truly a wonderful place to be, and I come here often.
Nothing (at least not yet), from the WAW, and I suppose at some level I don't expect anything, not even some acknowledgement. I've read more than enough here on the boards and in dozens of books to know about her emotional state right now, so it's probably unfair for me to expect any acknowledgement of the day.
Still, I can't help but also say that it hurts. I know I'm far from the only one to have experienced this, and others have experienced far worse. Still, it hurts. How did others cope with times like this? I know about GAL and all that, and I've been doing fine overall, all things considered. It's just that today is one of those really down days we all have from time to time. Thanks for listening.
Special days are always hard. Do you have friends or family you would like to get together with today? If not, maybe there is a show or nice restaurant you could go to. Something that you could do for yourself that is an acknowledgement of how special you are (yes, even if you don't feel that way).
As far as coping, my big thing is walking. I do alot of it and it really helps me. Anything physical helps calm the nerves. It will be ok. It's ok to feel however you feel. We all have our down days, just don't get stuck there.
Happy birthday...tho it's tough for the day. When H first left me and those special days came around I learned to find a fun friend to hang with. I actually had a better time than I would have had my husband been around. It helped take the sting out of the day.
special moments spent with special friends make all the difference in the world.
I'm sorry it's hard........and you're right........3 months is a short time......but time does heal and you have some wonderful growth moments ahead of you if you embrace them.
God bless you,
brue
I'm alive, I'm happy - why shouldn't I tell the world I've got my head screwed back on just fine. Life is good for the Brue!
Hey Bruce, I am a firm believer that birthdays are the most special day of the year and everyone deserves love on their birthday.
If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with...
By that I mean, do something wonderful for yourself today.
My ex always made a huge deal over my birthday. It was a big hurt for me to have him completely ignore it when it rolled around last year. (I did acknowledge his a few months later, by the way. Because that's what I do...)
But instead of letting him set the tone for what my birthday was going to be about (I had plenty of good ones before he came along), I decided to make it what I wanted it to be to the extent that I could.
I don't know what that means for you, for me it would probably mean, horseback riding in the morning, spa treatment in the afternoon, Mexican and margaritas with the girlfriends at night.
Whatever it might be for you, give it to yourself.
And believe that you are loved and cared about here, this is an amazing place and everyone loves an excuse to party.
In fact, if you pop over to the party thread later, we will share drinks and doodles with you. It's the least we can do...
My H ruined my last 2 birthdays. I know we say we don't expect anything but a lot of the time we do.
Annie is so right. Find something that you would truly enjoy and do it for yourself. It won't make it go away but it will really help you to move your focus onto yourself. I had a hard, hard time learning to do that because I'm just not built that way, but it has finally taken and I love it. I deserve it!
Let us know what you end up doing today for yourself!
Big Birthday Hugs, Sunflower
"Tell me what you plan to do with your one wild and precious life." Mary Oliver
Feliz, feliz en tu día, Amiguito(a) qué Dios te bendiga, Y qué reine la paz en tu día, Y qué cumplas muchos más.
Happy, happy on your day, Friend, may God bless you, May peace reign on your day, And may you have/complete many more (birthdays, years).
Here is the celebrity list
Lucy Hayes born on August 28, 1831
Charles Boyer born on August 28, 1899
Lamberto Maggiorani born on August 28, 1909
Fernando Fernán Gómez born on August 28, 1921
Donald O'Connor born on August 28, 1925
Dixie Evans born on August 28, 1926
Ben Gazzara born on August 28, 1930
Ken Jenkins born on August 28, 1940
David Soul born on August 28, 1943
Butch Lockley born on August 28, 1952
Daniel Stern born on August 28, 1957
Rick Rossovich born on August 28, 1957
Scott Hamilton born on August 28, 1958
Brian Thompson born on August 28, 1959
John Allen Nelson born on August 28, 1959
Emma Samms born on August 28, 1960
Jennifer Coolidge born on August 28, 1963
Amanda Tapping born on August 28, 1965
Shania Twain born on August 28, 1965
René Higuita born on August 28, 1966
Billy Boyd born on August 28, 1968
Juan Carlos Bonet born on August 28, 1968
Tom Fitzgerald born on August 28, 1968
Jack Black born on August 28, 1969
Jason Priestley born on August 28, 1969
Sherrie Austin born on August 28, 1970
Daniel Goddard born on August 28, 1971
Phaedra Hoste born on August 28, 1971
Todd Eldredge born on August 28, 1971
Beertje van Beers born on August 28, 1972
J. August Richards born on August 28, 1973
Carsten Jancker born on August 28, 1974
Eugene Byrd born on August 28, 1975
Vera Jordanova born on August 28, 1975
Daniel Andersson born on August 28, 1977
Dema Kovalenko born on August 28, 1977
Natasha Vojnovic born on August 28, 1979
Ruth Riley born on August 28, 1979
Carly Pope born on August 28, 1980
Corina Ungureanu born on August 28, 1980
Clarisa Fernandez born on August 28, 1981
LeAnn Rimes born on August 28, 1982
And...............
here is your horoscope
August 28 Birthday Horoscope
If Today is Your Birthday: August 28
Busy, busy, busy! The Sun conjunct Mercury in your Solar Return chart suggests that you have a lot to do this year. At times, you may feel like the pace of your life is running ahead of you. You can be especially productive, however, in all types of communications--writing, speaking, learning, teaching, and so forth. With Mercury also in favorable aspect to Jupiter, your ability to express yourself and to solve problems is enhanced this year. You may have opportunities to travel, and matters related to publishing, teaching, and writing should go especially well. You may find that you have the right information at the right time this year. You could also have big ideas and plans. Work, especially in communications, goes well.
Venus conjuncts Saturn and opposes Neptune around the time of your birthday. While at times you may feel insecure on a social level--even reclusive--other times this year you feel quite the opposite: sociable, in the mood to party, dramatic, extravagant, and inclined to overindulge as a result of a feeling of inner discontent and a desire for more from life than daily routines. Saturn asks you to be responsible, hard working, dutiful, and serious in your social life and with personal finances. Neptune, on the other hand, places a veil over your eyes, and seduces you into believing what you want to believe rather than what really is. You need to assess areas of your life that have become dysfunctional and, in the process, you may need to sacrifice a material benefit for a spiritual good (or vice versa). You are likely to face situations that are disillusioning on social, financial, and romantic levels. You are learning a valuable spiritual lesson that will help you to put your priorities in better perspective. This lesson may come in mysterious ways. Spiritual, artistic, or musical endeavors can provide a welcome relief. The final outcome will be a more serious and responsible attitude toward your own creativity and spiritual development. This can be a confusing time when you are not sure about who you are or where you are going in your love life. You may have to struggle to keep your feet firmly planted on the ground. Things that seemed glamorous in your dreams may reveal their flaws in the light of day.
Mars in square to Pluto around the time of your birthday this year suggests that you possess powerful, transformative energy, and much will depend on how you handle it. Channeled positively, you could move mountains when it comes to moving your projects ahead. If mishandled, however, you could be argumentative, stressed, and hell-bent on having your way! Avoid taking extreme measures to make things happen your way, and avoid people who might be doing same. Deliberately trying to maneuver things in order to get the upper hand will be a lesson in frustration.
A Jupiter-Uranus trine in your Return chart suggests that an enterprising spirit this year can really take you places. Sudden opportunities for advancement in different areas of your life appear. At the heart of this is your ability to recognize and capitalize upon opportunities and potentials. Fortunate events occur as a direct result of your willingness to entertain the unusual and to think outside of the box. This aspect favors group activities, financial endeavors associated with groups or organizational efforts, educational pursuits, writing, publishing, speaking, and humanitarian efforts.
2007 will be a Number Nine year for you. Ruled by Mars. This is a year of completion and transition. It is a time when we need to let go of things that no longer serve their purpose, and hold on to things that have a future. It is a time of cleaning out dead wood, not necessarily for new beginnings. It can be a time when a burden has been taken off your shoulders, and it can be a year of giving of yourself. Advice - let go of things that are holding you back, give of yourself and express your sympathetic, compassionate side.
Last edited by Lissie; 08/28/0704:59 PM.
Live Simply Love Generously Care Deeply Speak Kindly Leave the rest to God
Many, many thanks to all who took the time to read, and to those who posted you lifted my spirits immensely. This truly is a wonderful community. Where's the party thread?
I have to work a good part of today, but am going out for drinks with a friend tonight. Small, but important. I'll be treating myself to some Bruce Springsteen tickets when they go on sale later this fall--belated birthday presents. Love Bruce's music--it consoles me, but also provides joy.
Lissie, the horoscope looks dead on! Thanks for posting that.
Overall, I'm doing pretty well at the GAL and personal transformation stuff that I needed to work on long ago. Whether it's too late for my marriage, we'll see. I'm not running out. She'll have to pull the trigger, though at times I wonder if she'd like me to do so to relieve her of the guilt I think she's feeling. Doing so would affirm that I don't love her enough, which is BS but that's part of her reality.
I still believe in my marriage, and believe we can be good for one another. Still, some days this MLC stuff is damn hard! I worry that I don't, or won't, know her. Some days it's hard to see the road back, but I still believe that such a road exists out there somewhere. In the meantime, all I can do is work on myself, GAL, and watch her stream by in MLC! I've avoided most of the serious mistakes people make, thankfully. It seems like there's little one can do to improve things, but a LOT we can do to make it worse. We don't talk much at all, and I'm not forcing things. She hasn't talked divorce, so maybe all I can do for now is work on myself and wait for MLC to run its course. I'm not naive, however, as she may never come back.
