I recently got back from trip to Las Vegas. I had not spent much time with my dogs since my return, so I decided to sit in the backyard and play with them. I packed 3 Bud Lights in my ice-chest and some CDs and sat in my backyard (alone) while my dogs enjoyed getting petted and eating treats. I did this yesterday evening.
Anyway, this was something my WAH and I did frequently. Almost every weekend, we'd sit in the backyard and play with our dogs. I'm not sure if you all know who the band "Nickleback" is, but we used to like their music...I still do and have one of their CDs.
There is this song called "Someday" from Nickleback. It was one of our favorite songs. It's eerie, though, almost like a premonition, that some parts of this song would fit us today. Here are some of the lyrics from the song, "Someday," by Nickelback:
How the hell did we wind up like this Why weren't we able To see the signs that we missed And try to turn the tables
I wish you'd unclench your fists And unpack your suitcase Lately there's been too much of this Dont think its too late
(bridge) Nothin's wrong just as long as you know that someday I will
(chorus) Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when (You're the only one who knows that) Someday, somehow gonna make it allright but not right now I know you're wondering when
Well i hoped that since we're here anyway We could end up saying Things we've always needed to say So we could end up stringing Now the story's played out like this Just like a paperback novel Lets rewrite an ending that fits Instead of a hollywood horror
Repeat bridge and chorus
Anyhoo, I was listening to the song, and it brought tears to my eyes. I was remembering all the good times we had sitting in our backyard, BBQing, and playing with our dogs. My dogs have stopped missing my WAH. They used to all sit facing the driveway. They did this for months. Anyway, I was feeling pretty lousy yesterday evening. It had been a while since feeling that way. I guess it's because it's almost going to be a year since we split up.
alamogirl
Me - 48 (at time of 1st bomb) H - 43 married - 16 Jul 94 no children 1st bomb - (said he was leaving) - 3 Jun 06 2nd bomb (said he was ready to file) - 10 Nov 06 H filed divorce - 17 Nov 06 Divorce finalized - 20 Jul 07
Those moments hurt, and they will probably come forever, just less frequently. I've been divorced and separated over three years but every once in awhile, like you said, when you sit quietly, you have a moment, a moment when you miss what you thought you had.
And I think these moments are important, because they remind us we are human and feeling and we placed a priority on the relationship.