Sashaying thru Seperation III

[mcojh]

Well another one locked up. I wonder what causes that. Are there DB elves that do it??

Anyway, Happy Mothers Day to all you Mothers out there!!

Does anyone know how to combine all of my previous threads to make one link?

[mcojh]

I am having trouble linking my previous thread, so I am putting my last post here too.

Ah yes another sucessful date night, IMHO. We went to a small river town about 15 minutes from our house. It is a town that we always have liked to go to for an evening out, but with busy schedules, never made enough time to go there.

We ate at a nice Italian restaurant. A little spendy, but I didn't care, the food was great. We had some good conversation and an overall good time. During our talks, she made statements that I describe as "seperate" statements. Referring to me having to do stuff in the future without her around. She also tod me that she asked S15 if the fact that we do stuff is confusing to him. He told her that he is glad we are able to do stuff together. How can he not be confused????? Why did she tell him we were doing stuff together when we agreed from the beginning not to tell the kids.

Anyway, we stopped for a nightcap on the way home and I brought her home. We hugged and as she walked away, I was talking to her and she smirked and hit the garage door openner. I stuck my foot out and reversed the door and jumped in my truck, stuck my tongue out and left......

This AM, the phone rang at 6:30 and it was W. S15 had forgotten to get his trumpet music ready for orchestra. It was my fault. I was supposed to do it with him, as it was many copies and a mess. Unfortunately, he never told me he needed it today. I did it quick and dropped it at W's apt on the way to work.

We are still doing something together today for Mom's day, but the weather is crappy. Not sure what we will be doing.

[lovelyolive]

Keep up the good work studly. Have a great day!

[mcojh]

Yes, I am a stud. I just picked up the stuff for a "picnic" lunch, although due to the weather, it will be inside. I bought a small bunch of fresh flowers to put on the plant stand the boys are giving her and they look magnificent.

This morning, I was worried what she would think about the gift etc. Then I decided, that I am doing it from the heart and if she cannot appreciate the thought and effort too bad for her. I feel great about what I have done for her.

Smiling and waving.

[DadNotQuitting]

MC, I'm new to your post and was the last on one the one that locked up. Same old story, anytime I'm around anything technical, it goes south. Feel free to blame it on me for jumping aboard.

Hope your day goes well and in the direction we all know is possible.

[Matilda2]

How was the inside picnic? Sounds neat to me. Hope the gifts were well received. Loved what you said about being from your heart.

[mcojh]

Well, after I got rolling, I went to the store and bought a salad and sandwiches for everyone. When the tribe came over, everyone enjoyed their sandwiches. W later said that she preferred one over the other, as her and I split two wrap sandwiches.

W then openned her presents. I had put a bunch of purple daisy looking things on the plant stand along with the card. She was happy with the refinish job we had done on the stand and thought the flowers were pretty.

She openned her card and was shocked by the gift card inside. I even got a hug. She later told me that she felt bad about the gift card. I asked her why and she said that she had only asked for the plant sttand to be redone for her. I said, "I know, but I wanted to get that for you. It was my choice." She also asked when I had the time to go get it. I told her Tues, which showed that I planned it well in advance.

After this W, S6 and I went to the City Zoo, which is really nice fofr a free zoo. We walked around for about 3 hours. It was nice. She walked away to "sit in the shade" a couple times, and I let her.

On the way home we stopped at a dept store because I needed shoes and S6 needed new sandals.

She brought me home and thanked me again for the gift, I patted her on the shoulder and said goodbye.

All and all, a positive day. She makes statements about her and I as seperate entities, never any future statements about us. I don't expect that, but someday.

Ladies of DBing can maybe chime in. If you were deadset against your H, would you hang out all day with him and date him?

S & W

[DadNotQuitting]

Glad to see it all went well. I, like you, tend to be very quick to try to interpret actions of our Ws and try to find out what it really means in terms of the relationship. Of course, that usually seems to be a fruitless endeavor, but we keep doing it, don't we? Her walking away to sit in the shade alone, in my opinion, has to be her feeling the normalcy of the day; being with her husband, son, spending another Mother's Day together, a casual day at the zoo, a picnic. How could anybody, with any sense of compassion whatsoever, want to give this up? No, it isn't traveling the world high adventure, but that is not what most want anyway. It also isn't the "euphoria" of the sitch with OM (which seems faded already), but again, isn't a day like this why we all sign up for the ride anyway?

I think she's hanging out with you because she has serious questions about giving it all up. Sure, you two have your fair share of problems, and from you said, you have a lot of improving to do as well. She wants to be sure those changes are for real in you, so maybe every time together is some sort of test. I know you stated you have always had a hard time showing your feelings and all, and now you aren't "allowed" to go that deep per the rules of DB. Quite a conundrum, wouldn't you say. At any rate, it seems like she's testing the waters to see if it is safe to come back in. Certainly sounds like the green grass on the other side of the fence she went after has turned brown (and fat - couldn't help it).

That said, I've been known to be wrong too, so you get what you pay for.

Keep up the working out. Feels great, doesn't it?
DNQ

[lovelyolive]

MC - If I were completely gone, I would find better things to do than hang out with my husband. I might do the family thing but never just go out with my H.

By the way, the patting her shoulder and saying goodbye was AWESOME!! She expected more.. I just KNOW IT!!

[SuperDad]

MC,
You are getting stronger every day, I can read it in your posts. I am so happy for you. Your W will one day see how you have changed and what a catch you are. For her sake, I hope that SHE can make the changes necessary to win YOU back.

SD