WAW/MLC/QLC???

[GK99]

I've been thinking of posting on here for a while - not sure if it is the right place but there seems to be some similarities between my situation and others in this forum. The details of my sitch are found here:
My Story

I've read a lot of posts about the difference between WAS and MLC. The main difference seems to be that a true WAS will generally push for divorce rather quickly whereas MLC will drag their feet. Are there any other differences that you've found? My W has surrounded herself with a new group of friends (I don't know any of them). Not sure if there is OM yet, but I would guess there is (at least emotionally). She has not come by our house since early January and therefore has not seen our cats since then. This is a really big deal because our cats meant so much to her. She has been going "tanning", although a year ago she would make fun of people for doing that. She also told me she wanted a nose piercing last fall, although hasn't actually got one yet. Does this sound like MLC, or as someone else mentioned, QLC?

[lawless]

Sounds like QLC/MLC to me.

You are right in one respect,

WAW= gone and file for D

QLC/MLC= gone and bizzare behaviour with threats of D or possible D.

[Going Solo]

Although, if you're W is like mine, she may push for D quickly looking for a "permission slip" to act like she wants.

[GK99]

So if it is QLC/MLC, does that change how I should be handling things? Right now I'm pretty removed from her. I just got an email from her - just seeing how I'm doing and asking about my exam this weekend. She even asked about "the kitties". Do I wait until tomorrow and then respond with a friendly email back to her?

I also got a call from her brother last weekend. I haven't had a chance to call him back yet - should I? He's a good guy who doesn't agree with what she is doing, but because they are family he is supporting her.

[lawless]

First things first,

Start reading here, post here as well.

I just glossed over your sitch and am wondering if she has shown signs of having some sort of A.

Go ahead and respond in a nice light fashion but don't be in too much of a hurry to respond. Call her Bro. as well but be carefull what you talk about with him as I see him as a possible pipeline back to your W.

Time to GAL and live well, it will make you look attractive to her. If you have been persuing her, begging or pleading it should stop now.

I'll keep an eye on your sitch.

Billy

[GK99]

Thanks Billy.

I have not asked W about A since before Christmas so I don't know for sure. Just going by most other situations here, I would have to say there is a good possibility that she is having some sort of A. This is based on her behaviour, certain things I've noticed, and the laws of probabilities.

I'm not sure how I would handle that. I always figured that an A was a deal breaker with marriage but having spent some time on these boards I see that lots of people can get past it. I just don't know if I would be strong enough.

[lawless]

It was always a deal breaker for me, until it happened to me.

Once you get into the shoes the whole perspective changes.

Oh, I wouldn't bother asking her, I doubt she would be truthfull anyway

[GK99]

I have no intentions of asking her since I don't think I would get the truth. And if I got confirmation, I don't know what that would do to me.

So how do you deal with it?

I've read some of your situation but I am not sure where you guys are at now...has she filed?

[lawless]

I had to file seperation papers, my W was/ is going nuts spending money she ain't got. As far as the A I don't really know how I am dealing with it I just am.


Jazz, watch your tongue I have been with my W since she was 18

[GK99]

I promise...no more 17 year olds!