A very interesting read and theory about parenting. The book isn't one of these books that tells you specifically how to deal with specific situations. Rather it's about how we approach parenting, our mental attitude about it and what parenting really is, raising our children to be self aware, confident and self reliant adults. The idea is that first we need to look at ourselves and question our own actions, attitudes, behaviors and such before we can begin. We shouldn't be responsible "for" our children but "to" our children. It boils down to controling our own actions and not trying to control our children but influence and direct them. Sound familiar?
I give this book a full 5 stars, probably the best parenting book I have yet read.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
Bump...just getting this topic back to the top of the list.
Currently reading "The Five Languages of Apology" by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas. A very interesting read and a good follow up to "The Five Love Languages".
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
These books are great. It seems your W. is somewhat receptive to you trying here. My w. would only say: "I know what you're trying to do, and it only annoys me". Best of luck. She wants to work on your R. Believe me, you are so lucky to even hear those words. Tread gently. It will be like trying to feed a squirrel. Don't force anything. Don't rush anything. I see you've now been here over a year. This bites, my friend!
I read both. Short books but to the point. Someone (TJ) years ago when I first joined here turned me on to them. I found these much better than Mars/Venus.
It's amazing how much common sense (to us men) is in FMO, but yet is news to all the women I passed this book onto.
In fact, if any women read FWO, I'd love to get a "review" to see how accurate (in your opinion) the author is.
My Bible study group is starting the Five Love Languages, so I'll be reading that one soon.
One's that I've read... Love Must be Tough by Dobson. This book became my bible in our first seperation, and I think attributed a lot to our reconciliation. I read it in one night (and I'm a slow reader). I was just able to relate so much to several of the stories.
Love and Respect by Eggerichs This was recommended by my mc right before the sep. I still haven't finished it, but so far it makes a lot of sense. I can see this book having a very good impact. AND there's a Love and Respect seminar coming to my town in Feb. I'd like h to go.
Divorce Remedy…of course.
Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands by Dr. Laura Well, I had a hard time with this book. It has good advice, really good. But, it just didn’t relate to my situation very well. My mom gave me this book…bless her for trying.
Love, Honor and Vacuum by Gregoire When you feel more like a maid, than a wife and mother. This book was less about relationships, and more about reprioritizing things such as housework, to make more time for the important things.
for parents…
Playful Parenting by Cohen Fun ways to be a parent and discipline through the power of play. Make sure you get the one by Cohen. There is another book with the same title, that’s not so good.
The No Cry Sleep Solution by Pantley For the sleep deprived parents…
Me 36 Husband 35 D5 S2 separated: 10/29/07-present Served divorce papers 1/22/09 "When the world gives out beneath your feet, it is time to learn how to fly."
Realized there's another book I read that was recommended to me and I found helpful.
The Secret by Rhonda Byrne
It's a short book so it's a quick read. I found it very helpful in adjusting my attitude back to a consistent positive attitude. It's basic premise is by having a positive attitude and believing in what it is you are wanting or trying to achieve then it will happen. It also says that having a negative slant to thinking is just like thinking you don't want something. So a good example would be if you think "I don't want a divorce" then what'll happen is you'll get a divorce. So you should think in positive terms, "I want a happy, healthy, loving marriage with my wife." In the end its just saying the power of positive thinking is the secret to achieving your goals and a happy life.
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
The Five Languages of Apology by Gary Chapman and Jennifer Thomas. Chapman also wrote The Five Love Languages series.
This is another good book that I highly recommend. Why, because it helps outline how when we wrong someone or have fault how we can sincerely let someone else know we are sorry. I know it sounds simple but it's amazing once you really dig into it how by not saying I'm sorry in the right way can greatly diminish your apology.
My primary apology language, Accepting Responsibility and my secondary is Genuine Repentance along with Making Restitution. Clearly from reading this I've never spoken my wife's primary, Making Restitution. I would always say I'm sorry, show regret, even ask for forgiveness. But I'd fail at some point and do the same thing all over again. Hence she never felt like I was truly sorry.
FYI, the 5 languages are:
Expressing Regret Accepting Responsibility Making Restitution Genuinely Repenting Requesting Forgiveness
If we really want to love, we must learn how to forgive. - Mother Theresa
