Hi Everyone, I have been separated for 7 months. Husband is in affair with OW. We are not divorced, but have sold our house and split most of our assets. Our relationship has improved and I have been fairly dark for 6 weeks. We are living in seperate apartments. My h bought condo with OW and I agreed to sign an agreement removing my name from the condo. We had a wonderful lunch and he volounteered to come over and help with setting up a dvd and other things. I db'd and didn't talk about relationships. At the end we hugged twice and he kissed me on the forehead. I sent him an e-mail regarding a squirrel that ate through my screen door. This is how he responded: Looks like your new friend won't take no for an answer. He must have been talking to his buddy in the valley and found out you feed the critters. Thank you again for taking care of the escrow. I didn't get a chance to say how sorry I am for hurting you and hope you will someday forgive me. I think we have both come out better people and think you have done well for yourself. It was great to see you pick up the guitar. Keep it up and remember I will always be there for you. Help, what does this really mean and how should I respond? beeber --------------------
It sounds like you've done a fine job of keeping the lines of communication open. You've acted "as if" and retained the good feelings from your sitch. He is obviously aware of your GAL activity in picking up your guitar again. There's lots to work with here but just remember to be patient. Do you think going dark somehow had an impact on your H? It's great that he wants to hang on to you in some way, friend or whatever. Make this work for you.
thanks whatisis! I do think going dark, detaching made a big difference, It was hard, but I needed to do it. I'm going to thank him for his nice thoughts and wish him a good thanksgiving. I don't want to address any hearttflelt conversations in e-mail and it would probably chase him away. I t was a good weekend. Keeping positive! Thanks for your thoughts! Do you have any further suggestions on how to keep this workin'?
