Thanks for the comments, everyone. Yes, knowing this does help. And Susie, your comments are very timely-- I was just about to broach the subject. I guess I'll take your comment as the voice of God and put it off.
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Edited to add... well I disregarded the voice of God and I did tell him. I said I think some of the rage he feels at the betrayal of his ex is rooted in rage at the betrayal of his innocence by his mom. And I did give the example of the daughter. So sue me. He said the thing with the ex and the thing with his mom are TOTALLY separate and unrelated but he would think about it.
He'll be digesting this for a long time and no doubt he and C will discuss it in private. Actually I shouldn't say "no doubt" because I don't know what they talk about.
Anyway, in addition to my immense compassion over his sitch, I'm having some resentment over "here we go again" with issues of his that need tending and now it will NEVER be my turn to get any goodies. We're always picking up after him. I never claimed to be a saint.
Corri, he will never read PBTS. He is not a reader. Period. Not. Ever. Whatever he learns about the book/method will have to come from me or C.
Quote: Anyway, in addition to my immense compassion over his sitch, I'm having some resentment over "here we go again" with issues of his that need tending and now it will NEVER be my turn to get any goodies. We're always picking up after him. I never claimed to be a saint.
I know EXACTLY how you feel. I don't think asking "what about me?" is so inherently bad, it's figuring out the timing that's tough.
So sorry to hear about his past situation. I'd have a hard time being in the same room as his mother, let alone be civil to her. Hang in there.
Re Lil So sue me. He said the thing with the ex and the thing with his mom are TOTALLY separate and unrelated but he would think about it. Lil, I would also say they would feel unrelated on the surface to your bf.
"here we go again" with issues of his that need tending and now it will NEVER be my turn (((((Lil))))) I would like to see your turn come up Lil.
((((Lil)))) Im so sorry!you are going through this.I am glad to here you are going to C.Your BF has been through so much its good that he is opening up,This is so awfull how can anyone treat a child like this....It makes me so mad.when he opens up and deals with this, how ever painfull.Then his healing will begin...You are so wonderfull and such a caring partner. your BF is a very lucky man. Its going to take some time Lil....my heart goes out to you both.Dont forget to take care of yourself...
wow, Lil, I am glad your bf found a safe place to reveal himself...imagine the shame, humiliation, anger, etc. that he is carrying around. I hope he is feeling less burdened.
