Thank you Dogma for your suggestions and wise words. I have appt. tmr to see Legal aid. I do eat well and sleep well, I need to improve on the exercise--I have a sore right foot.
If 37 people read the post, I sure wish more would post their thoughts!! Why are you here anyways?
The hardest thing in the world for me is to not think guilty of the past. I feel memories are all I have, even if they are sad! You realize that this is HELL for me, means a lot. My dr. does too. I want to believe that just cuz xh says it, does not force me to believe it. I want believe I can make it, I just feel I am going to let myself die early like my mother did. Of broken heart. THANK YOU AGAIN, LeftAlone
"Things don't go wrong and break your heart so you can become bitter and give up. They happen to break you down and build you up so you can be all that you were intended to be." -- Charlie "Tremendous" Jones
I'm sure a lot of people look and don't respond (like I wasn't going to) because your situation is outside of most of our comfort level.
I'm really sorry about how things shook out for you. I can't imagine not seeing your child. You do have my sympathy. But in all honesty, in reading your post, I don't feel you are ready for a relationship with your XH. And I don't know how ready you are to have your child back in your life, unless it's supervised. I hope that wasn't too harsh, but you sound very depressed and also potentially suicidal.
My suggestion: Start with yourself. You need help. Get all the help you can. Get back on your feet. Become comfortable being a single person again. Get therapy for depression. When things improve, try to get at least supervised visitation and go from there. Forget about a life with your XH. Perhaps if you become complete and healthy, he will once again see you as someone he can fully trust and be with. You have to start with baby steps. Hope that helps.
Me
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Where is the post of the situation? All I see is two posts, there should be more to the thread. That may be why you are not getting more replies. You need to hit the reply button every time to keep the string going, if you use post, it fragments I think. Can't give any advice blind other than hang in there for now, and will look for the repost of the rest of your story. RJ
