So, if they had the meeting without you, what was the outcome?
L called and left a message for me to call on Monday. I did and now W&I have to go to see a 3rd L and each pay $75. Then we have to go to class to learn how to be divorced parents.
Today I spent the afternoon wandering around a shopping center with 2 friends who are women. We laughed so much and so hard. Then we had dinner together. A fun afternoon!
Glad you had a good weekend!Isn't it great to go out with friends and laugh and really have fun again? It's one of the ways that you can tell you are moving forward. You sound very centered and grounded right now. You have taken yourself out of your WAW's chaos and are grounded in your own actions and beliefs. Good for you! This journey is not easy but can be handled in a way that keeps you sane and is in the best interest of your DD's. You are on the high road. And it really shows!
Have a great week -
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
Quote: You're welcome. Hey, anybody who knows vintage Billy Joel is A-OK in my book!
Bottle of red, bottle of white Whatever kind of mood you're in tonight I'll meet you anytime you want In our Italian restaurant.
I just finished ripping a Billy Joel CD for D14 and this respone came to mind. I can't beleive it took me 9 days to come back with this to a woman whose thread is entitled "Mind if I join you for a glass of wine?" I'm about as smooth as sandpaper.
Your smooth in my book! Billy Joel is great - thanks for the lyrics! How are things with you? And how are things with your DD's? My kids are hanging in there but I can see this is hard on them. My D11 had to write an autobiography for school. In it she wrote that she never wanted to get married. That made me sad. I hate for H's and my mistakes to jade her life. But, if I keep being positive and H and I can continue to be civil and just love our kids, I think everything will be okay. It's hard though.
Have a good rest of the week!
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
I have read so many posts, books, etc, and have learned so many new ideas that I'm having trouble sorting some things out. I would like some comments on this email that I sent to WAW on Friday. (Background info: DD's were visiting W's apt on Thu PM as is the usual schedule.)
Hi,
This morning at the breakfast table D14 was doing homework because she didn't take her book to the apartment last night. When I asked her if she was doing homework, she said, "Yes, I forgot my book last night. It was my fault." As far as I know this is the first time this has happened. I want to talk to D14 as to why she said, "It was my fault." From the way she said it, I got the impression she felt she needed to protect you.
Kids, especially teenagers, say the darndest things. Don't know what the my fault comment was about. Maybe she did accidentally leave the book. Just try to approach your W with it as a general thing. Soemthing like "D14 said this. I'm not quite sure what she meant by that. What do you think?". Try to keep it as neutral as possible and keep the discussion as a "joint parenting" discussion. The more the two of you can compromise and discuss the DD's in a co-parenting manner, I think that things will also begin to smooth out and the two of you can make some progress. I hope that made sense. I'm so tired right now! Have a great evening!
WCB
God grant me the serenity,
to accept the things I cannot change,
To change the things I can,
And the wisdom to know the difference.
- Reinhold Niebuhr
still trucking I see. good for you. I was pleased to see that you were out with friends.
You asked about your email.
what is your intent with the email?
Trying to create situations where boundaries can be enforced it not very authentic. It will be dismissed/ignored and at worst seen as flailing for power that is not there. Is there anything in it or about it that comes off as placating or supplicating?
There will always be opportunities to demonstrate strength, but trying to create situations to assert yourself will not be fruitful.
It appears that your daughter has been preemptively placed in the middle of this allready. Thats not cool. Keeping her there further, or being the one to actually place her there, would be uncool also. She is old enough to take responsibility for her own homework/reading.
I see someone got you that link. Also, I think it was smr that has a link "pinned up" at the top of one of the sections listing ALL the MLC Resources in One Thread. You would find more links and reading material organized there.
Then we have to go to class to learn how to be divorced parents. 
