Boy, can I relate to this first post. My husband has constant and unrelenting moods. I have tried to fix them for over 20 years. Sometimes they are in response to life in general but most of the time they are just there. Depression runs in his family big time.
the latest problem is his mother coming to visit for 3 weeks. She is 89 years old and has been depressed for over 30 years. is on an anti-depression med but still it is like a black cloud descends on the house when she comes. The kids even notice it and she drives them crazy too. So when she is coming (has come for over the last 5 years usually at 3 - 4 week visits, sometimes stays for 2 months!) I go into a deep depression and cry uncontrollably for the first few days before she comes. I move furniture, clean house and cry the whole time. It is unbearable. Today, H and I had a big blow out about it. I literally cannot help it and he is upset that I am so nasty about her visits. I suffer from depression too but at least i try to control it but when she comes, I just loose it. I try to really cope with her but it is like another child in the house. I already have 3 kids and H usually spends most of his home time up in his "4 walls"( his name for our bedroom) while I spend my time downstairs cleaning, cooking and spending time with the kids. We have very little affection between us (he cringes when I try for a hug) and sex is nonexistent (not my decision). I have no friends to talk to because I am embarrassed that my marriage is such a wreck. I cannot tell them my situation because everyone thinks our marriage is so good. How embarrassing that my husband finds me so unattractive.
He will probably pull the silent treatment on me for the next week or so but I just cannot handle the woman for 3 weeks. I had the guts to finally tell him today and she is not coming. Part of me is so relieved but I know I will have to "pay" for her not visiting.
