Hope, I am so sorry. You gave everything you had, so don't beat yourself up if things are not working out. It has nothing to do with you. So your H has a fling... so what? It's time for you to get a fling of your own. We all know where this is going to go: XH will come around again, once he finds out ow does not solve his problems. He is depressed and lost. Now you have a choice: hang around moping until he wakes up again or pick up your pieces, GAL and move on. They always seem to come back faster when you opt for option number 2.
I can honestly say, my old XH is back. We called a truce on Friday and spent the last three days together with the girls. Absolutely wonderful. Lots of hugs and kisses, tons of ILY (that I haven't heard in months), we even ML. The only problem is that it took him having to move 3000 miles away to be able to be himself again.
Thursday we each had our Thanksgivings with our own families. Friday we talked and hung out. Saturday I helped him pack. Saturday night we stayed up until 3am talking and just being with each other. We finally took a bubble bath together in the tub. Sunday we hung out. The movers came and got the boxes and furniture.
It's so hard right now. I did not want to end things like there were, so angry and unhappy. But this is breaking my heart. I love him. I always have and always will. All he can do is think about all these wonderful memories we've shared over the past six years. I know this is for the best, but oh god it hurts so much. It's all I can do not cry constantly. They leave Wednesday morning. I don't know if I can do this...
Hope, I'm happy that you've had some happier experiences with him before he leaves but I'm sorry that it causes so much more pain.
Hang in there and things will work out. I'm sending tons of hugs and thoughts and prayers.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
Hang in there, you never know what the future holds. As your name says "Hopeful Future". Maybe being 3000 miles apart will do something for him.
I'm sure it must be real hard for you right now. Just don't let yourself get too down from all of this. Try as hard as you can to keep your spirits up.
Well, it's over now. They left this morning. D11 and I are camped out on the couch watching movies. The need to cry comes and goes, more so when I let myself think. Most of this just doesn't feel real yet. It feels like I'm just home with a sick kid and he's at work, he'll be home later. I don't know when it will all hit me. I'm not looking forward to it.
Things will be okay. I know they will. Right now the world just doesn't feel right. It feels very off right now. I never thought I would miss him this much already.
Quote: The need to cry comes and goes, more so when I let myself think
Don't try to stop it and hold it inside. Let it out. You and D11 let out all your feelings. Won't make everything go away but maybe it will make you feel a little better.
I am so sorry you are going through this. My heart aches for you.
Quote: It feels like I'm just home with a sick kid and he's at work, he'll be home later.
This is how I cope sometimes. I pretend H is on an extended vacation or something.
Quote: I don't know when it will all hit me. I'm not looking forward to it.
When it hits you just go with the flow. Let it all out. Call a friend to be there with you. You and D11 do something fun today. Keep busy.
You are in my prayers. You are a strong woman and I know you will make it through this. We are here for you.
