Well guys, it's over. We had the "talk" last night. We'll put the house on the market after the holidays and then that's it. We talked a lot last night and we both got a lot out. It was very good. He held me while I cried. Actually he held me most of the night. He was so much like his old self.
I found a town house right down the street from my parents. It's a great place and a good price. D11 will be able to go back to school with all her old friends. And I can afford it.
Part of me is relieved that it's over, but mostly it just hurts. I'm having a very hard time not crying today. I never honestly believed in my heart it would turn out this way. I always thought some mircle would happen that would save us. Not this time I guess.
I'm not sure how to go from here. I feel so many different things right now. He's been my love for six years now and I'm not sure how to completely let go of him. This just really sucks.
If you want to smile, or at least a little chuckle - look at my thread (I broke my 4th toe Friday) LOL.
You are a strong, independent, smart woman. I know this is hard but I also know that you have the knowledge and the strength to be ok.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
I am crying with you. I am so sorry you are going through this. It is good you have found a place near your parents. You and your daughter will do just fine. You are a strong woman and I know you will make it.
Quote: He's been my love for six years now and I'm not sure how to completely let go of him
Do we ever let go of our real loves? My H has been my true love for 18 years. Talk about hard.
Just remember, we are here for you anytime you need us.
Well since we had our little "talk" Sunday night XH has become a completely different person. He's been extremely nice to me and very affectionate. I'm very confused by all this. Why now, that it's over, is he able to treat me the way he should have been treating me all along? When I told him and the kids "I love you all." the other day, I got a "We love you too." from him. WTF????
So is it over? Did he need me to give up for him to be able to be nice to me? Or does he just feel that he can be this way now because it is over? It's so hard and this only makes it worse!
Hope - that is very perplexing. I am sorry you are going through this. Not sure if you are looking for advise or anything, but I would confront him on it. Just say- "WTF? We have this talk, we decide it is over, and now you change? " That's just me. Hope you have good day. How was your Halloween? Pass out candy? Dress up? Take the girls trick or treating?
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.
I think its because the pressure is off of him. Does that make sense. Now that you said it was over, he can stop "feeling" all the things he didnt want to feel or not feel anymore. Maybe he feels like by calling it quits, it wiped his slate clean. Now he can start over? I am not sure..just pulling out straws here...take it as it is now, but keep moving forward with your life. The more you move in a different direction the better things could get!
Quote: I think its because the pressure is off of him
I agree. It seems when things started to get better for my H and I it was when the pressure was lifted off his head. He seems to get along more now that he knows I am not going to call him all the time or keep asking when he is coming home.
I think it gives them time to think more other than always trying to please us. When they don't have to "try" to please us it seems to flow better.
Quote: take it as it is now, but keep moving forward with your life. The more you move in a different direction the better things could get!
