Are you the High Drive partner? Please respond and tell; what has worked for you to curb your "desire." I've heard all the theories about what it is and how it works, but personal experience is the best info...
Other the drugs, there really is nothing that can actually lower libido. In fact, many of the things that us HD are supposed to do to make ourselves happy actually CAUSE my libido to increase even more. Everywhere I go, there are beautiful women, and there are couples enjoying each other. So lowering a sex drive, I don't think it's possible.
I'm with Lil on this one. I am HD but it went into hiding after years of not connecting with H on either a sexual or intimate level. I still fantasized all the time though about being with someone HD so the "urge" is always there. It was just hidden from H at the time. We are working on this with great results right now.
For me it was getting pounded time after time after time. My advances were rebuffed so many times. Finally after a particularly bad week this August, I just never rebounded. I don't pursue her. This is perhaps a little more information than you wanted but here goes. In the past, I wouldn't MB any night that I thought there was a chance W and I might ML. Then, if she refused, I would be really mad, because I had been denied twice, once by her and once by myself. Now I just let 'er rip any old night. I figure if she really wants it I'll find it somehow. But in any case, I go to bed relaxed and stress free. And as I mentioned in my other post, W has begun to sleep with me and without the kids, so the potential for nookie has increased.
I still think she's the hottest woman walking the face of the earth. I let her know I'm there whenever she wants me. But no more begging for me.
I have a much higher drive than my wife. I don't think there is any one thing I can do to curb my desire for her. There have been nights I have slept in a differnet room just because laying next to her all I wanted to do was reach out and touch her (when I tried touching, I would get a comment of "won't you let me sleep"). We tried a compromise of I wouldn't try to initiate sex during the week so she could get her sleep, but Friday night, Saturday morning/night were fair game and she would go along with it if she wasn't on her P. That lasted 3 weeks, then she was refusing me every Friday and Saturday for 2 months straight. I still usually don't try to initiate on week nights, but try every weekend, I just end up MB a lot more.
I am the high drive partner in my situation. I have not posted for a while because things have been going well. She started making an effort to initiate and participate more, but I do see it sliding back to the norm. I have been concentrating more on myself- working out to make myself more desirable to her (she now touches me alot more), and to feel better about myself. I find that if I workout or run on a regular basis, my drive is lowered. I do not desire her less, but my blinding sexual desire is squashed enough to make the current amount of sex enough to keep me from thinking too much about it. Andy
God is love, love is blind, Ray Charles is blind......so there.
