I don't think I have ever posted to you before but I have been following your story for the last 2 years. I think that you should be so proud of yourself. You have come so far in your journey and now you are able to be such a help to others on theirs. When you start to feel down just remember what a gift you are to all of your friends here on the board and there are many more than you think. We just don't all post .
God Bless, havefaith
GOD HEALS HURTING MARRIAGESwww.rejoiceministries.org
Pam, just like Bethie, I feel happy to have finally found you! I want you to know that I admire your very wise advice -- you have helped so many people here, including me.
Quote: I am also eating a lot, (emotional I'm sure), and getting almost no exercise. Have gained 13 lbs since I think November is last time I weighed. So I'm sure the extra weight is adding to my general not feeling well. I did the same thing last time, gained a lot of weight and didn't even realize it that time till it was all gained!
It's kind of counterintuitive. If you start taking care with what you eat, you will be taking care of yourself -- and you will feel better. If you can make tiny exercise goals and accomplish them, you'll find you move on to slightly bigger goals -- and you'll feel better! And the best part is you'll be doing it for Pam, not for D.
Quote: I think I had a spell there for a while where I wasn't struggling with the depression but I am sure that I am now. Last time around I did not realize it.
I am still on the 50 mg dosage of Zoloft, which is half of what I was on as we were stepping me down. I need to go ahead and finish the stepping down before I am out of medication. But want to put some other things in place to work on the depression before I finish coming off the Zoloft.
I am not a doctor (nor do I play one on TV) but I've heard that some antidepressants can have weight gain as a side effect. Maybe Ellie can comment on that one. Don't be too hard on yourself -- if it's depression, it's actually great because there are so many ways to treat it today! Keep your eye on it, though, because it's important.
Quote: I guess I'm not sure what I am looking for here other than I KNOW this pattern isn't where I want to go but I'm not really sure how to start changing it.
One way you might start is to take another look at your goals and see which you can tackle now. (It's also nice to acknowledge those you've already met!) Make your baby steps from your goals, and you'll be on your way!
See, you are poised to really take off. You're almost there and we're all here to cheer you on when you start to fly.
Pam - Check out a book called The Mood Cure (by Ross, I think). It has to do with using diet and supplements to combat depression, I think you might find it helpful.
Nice to hear from one of my readers. I know at times my thread gets read and I always wonder who reads it. I realized when I read your post it embarrasses me to have someone have read my past threads, but I need to not be ashamed of them as they are who I was and I have worked to move past the person I was on some of them.
I was amazed to get home and have 3 posts! I wasn't even having a bad day. Not happy with where I am but more a sort of kicking around till I get things sorted and head in the direction I want to go.
Thank you for the encouragement.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Thank you so much for the book recomendation. I will do that as I really WANT off of the AD's. Not just that they are expensive but some of the way they make me feel I am ready for them to be gone.
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
Quote: I want you to know that I admire your very wise advice -- you have helped so many people here, including me.
I am amazed. I read you, Wonder, Betsey and several others discussions and am in awe of the depth of thinking and processing taking place in those discussions. I so wish I thought like that! Just today I was discussing with Sage that I still want to be logical and do you have to be born with it or CAN it be learned??????? I think her answer meant it can be learned. So now to figure out how!
Quote: It's kind of counterintuitive. If you start taking care with what you eat, you will be taking care of yourself -- and you will feel better. If you can make tiny exercise goals and accomplish them, you'll find you move on to slightly bigger goals -- and you'll feel better! And the best part is you'll be doing it for Pam, not for D.
This is what I feel I need to be doing. I am not always a good self motivator! So the encouragement I am getting here I hope is enough to lead me to get my tail in gear!
Quote: See, you are poised to really take off. You're almost there and we're all here to cheer you on when you start to fly.
Thank you Michele and after such praise I can't not follow through, right? You know that sometimes troublesome sense of humor of mine!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
This morning I intended to continue working on my list of positives. Got up feeling pretty off and think it is allergies. Took some allergy medicine and didn't realize it wasn't non drowsy! Now I'm fighting to stay awake.
Hopefully I will be back later with my list.
But one positive that is now off my to do list:
Spoke with my neighbor last night as I still don't have a mower and he is going to try to get my yard mowed tonight. Now I will be able to find the puppy when it goes out and lays down!!!
Pam
"We must be willing to let go of the life we had planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us"
.
I know at times my thread gets read and I always wonder who reads it. I realized when I read your post it embarrasses me to have someone have read my past threads, but I need to not be ashamed of them as they are who I was and I have worked to move past the person I was on some of them.
Not happy with where I am but more a sort of kicking around till I get things sorted and head in the direction I want to go. 
