I've decided I need a third party to hear the story and help us out. Like some others on the board, I have not made enough (if any) progress to warrant more of the same discussions and I feel like we may be able to break through the blockade with a C.
BTW I ordered SSM, but my W not only wouldn't read it but returned it to Amazon (quote "I am not having that in my house"). So, we call in the professionals.
There seems to be a methodology of temporizing and making just enough change to get the tension level reduced, then it's back to the same routine. There seems to be this incredible creative avoidance that my W practices, I hope for our sake that it's a simple case of priorities or inability to relax and not something terrible. Guess I'll find out soon enough.
Let me make sure that I understand this correctly.
You ordered a book, and your wife sent it back without your approval. Is that correct?
-NOPkins-
I will ferret out an affair at any opportunity.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
No, I just said "f**k it" and left it on the table. At that point, I didn't care what she did with it. Sent it back and now she gets to go with me to the C. A real time saver, and a lot less trouble...NOT. She said doesn't believe that women can have a SD when they age, and implied anything to the contrary is an affront to her.
I can so identify with you. About a month ago I suggested to my LDW that there is a book that might help. I bought SSM a year ago and have read it twice. I never told her I got it. Anyway, she wouldn't even let me tell her what the book was or what it was about. She said that she "is who she is" and I better just get used to it. She not only sees nothing wrong with having a low desire, she sees no reason to change it. Any effect this has on me is just a result of ME being selfish. We ML every 20-30 days when I initiate.
She truly feels like it is just a matter of me accepting that she is only in the mood once every two weeks IF everything is going great.
-An affair is the embodiment of entitlement, fueled by resentment and lack of respect. -An infidel will remain unreachable so long as their sense of entitlement exceeds their ability to reason.
I don't know what anyone else will say to this, but I would have had to have said something to my H if he returned something like that after I bought it. It's one thing for her to not read the book...it's a completely different issue for her to return it without consulting you.
I second the thought your W had no right to retutn the book just as you have no right making her read the book. I don't get spouses who act like the books are the enemy along with us.
I have about 10 books and W will not read any of them. I had them on the coffee table for a couple of months where she could see them. I got some negative comments about the books so I moved them to my shop.
