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#411451 01/24/05 02:55 PM
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ARB:

Not to dumb on your wife, but not being able to enjoy having sex because she is no longer trying to have babies is a mental excuse.

Have you read Passionate Marriage? I think there was a couple in that book where the W tried to use the same exuse. Anybody remember that one?

Corri

#411452 01/24/05 03:05 PM
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Corri, oh, it is a psychological thing. She doesn't think it is something seriously wrong with her. Something she said that bothers me is that she said that when we first got married we did it twice a month and she was glad that was it. I remember it more like twice a week. We've been married 10 years so I am certain I can remember that far, unless I was having all that sex with someone else back then and did not know it

#411453 01/24/05 03:46 PM
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allrightboy,

Well I doubt it's menopause (not that it couldn't be)...but I'll be 38 in Sept. and I can tell you that for me I only want sex more than I did when I was younger. Of course I'm not getting it, so that could contribute to why I want it so much. But even before I met and married my H (35) this was the same for me.

My best guess...it's in her head. She may really have some type of an issue with sex=baby.

GEL


Well behaved women rarely ever make history!
#411454 01/24/05 06:25 PM
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Greeneyes. You want it and are not getting it. I want it and am not getting it. The four of us should have met 10 years ago.

#411455 02/22/05 09:30 PM
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Maybe I'm going to far on this one, but is it at all possible for women to have an orgasm by avoiding her private area and massaging certain parts of her body?

I thought I heard sometime ago that this was possible

#411456 02/23/05 08:57 AM
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allrightboy wrote a whild ago.
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My w is a therapist and has developed an EA with a female patient. Now my w is confused, she doesn't know if she is bi. She thinks she loves the girl as a daughter.
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Did you or your W make any progress on this issue?

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I thought I heard sometime ago that this was possible
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female sexuality here

Self pleasuring here

Surveys

There is a long list of other topics on the home page. Just remember every woman is different and do not have to do something because it fits some norm.

#411457 02/23/05 08:56 PM
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Thanks Lou, you are the best. BTW, me and w are still stuck in status quo land. It seems like it will be a waiting game, to see who blinks first. My W won't leave, but on the other hand the former patient is in the wings waiting. I would like to think she will be on her merry way some year. I know that our marriage will not improve until that issue is settled.

#411458 02/24/05 05:03 AM
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allrightboy wrote
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I know that our marriage will not improve until that issue is settled.
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Spot on, bingo. In the meantime do things for yourself so you stay sane, some what happy, and attached to your W / family as seems appropriate.

I posted the links so you can see the variety of feelings females have. Trouble is your W is the only other player in this game you can play with unless you want more confusion in your M by involving someone else.

I read about other females to guage if my perceptions match what my W is telling me what is normal. W says X-Y is normal, I say, to you X-Y is normal and I understand that W, BUT I know that 80% of the women your age say X alone is what they like. So you can't say I am abnormal for likeing X. If you like X-Y that is OK with me most of the time. I use what I read to avoid being made to feel strange.

OG Lou

#411459 02/24/05 01:41 PM
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Mental copulation, you don't have to touch the woman at all if you know how to say certain things with a particular modulation at the perfect time.


I don't mind the sun sometime The images it shows I can taste you on my lips And smell you in my clothes Cinnamon and Sugar And softly spoken lies You never know just how you look Through someone elses eyes BHS-"Pepper"
#411460 02/24/05 01:50 PM
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Allrightboy,
Do you have children?

How would you feel about a therapist developing a sexual relationship with one of YOUR kids?

Take a stand both for your marriage and for this girl, who is mentally unable to do so for herself at this time.

Gently talk to your wife and tell her that this unhealthy R has to go. If it doesn't, you will be obligated to go to the authorities.

Don't be afraid of the consequences; what you have now with her is not necessarily a healthy marriage anyway. And it's NOT going to change unless one of the three parties forces it: either you, your wife, or the girl.

Good luck to you.

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