Divorcebusting.com Forums Open Forums Midlife Crisis MLC Wife files for D on son's birthday----Why?

Sh,

sorry about the "birthday surprise", but please try to realize, it was nothing purposeful on her part. Just indifference. Jack, you really think we're the dramatic ones, huh? What about the scary anger episodes you guys have? Okay, all the WAS/MLCs do show some serious anger flare ups. So, let's do a study and gather empirical data to prove the....oh wait, all that sucks... And guys are scary maybe b/c you are bigger and stronger. NEXT TOPIC:::: What I wanted to say was this: No matter how crazy your wife gets (and please tell me she is not literally with her bf from 4th grade....??) I can't believe she won't miss the kids. Maybe not at first, but the memories will flood her at times. Tuck in times, cute puppies, the park, all the things she has been doing with them. And, guilt will overwhelm her at times, could shame her so much that she doesn't bother to try returning home. So, you have to remember the phrase, "Keep the Road Home Paved and Smooth". If you still do want the M to continue.

Also, you already know your kids need you more than ever. If you "lose it" then they'll be at least temporary orphans. So you gotta hang in there. And last, your wife will either see you interacting lovingly, or hear of it from the kids. NO mother is unmoved by that. Ladies/Moms, chime in please. I LOVE seeing my H play with the kids. Even when I "hated H", even when I was tempted to say "Oh NOW you want to go to Disneyland, since you've missed 2 years/homework/illness/the inconvenient things and stuff of every day life... etc" but I saw how much our daughters need and love him. Their happiness was/is much healthier and far more important than my anger, not to mention more helpful. And hearing them laughing, watching them play, talk, interact together with their dad,is just Emotionally and physically a real turn on. No way can she shut that all out.

Her biggest challenge might end up being how to stop running from the damage she has inflicted, b/c her shame will be too great. Then you'll have your own challenge, seeeing how well your forgiveness skills are. Good luck, keep up the great work and hug those little ones. You sound like such a good loving dad. ((hugs))
j-