Listen to how ridiculous this is. I went to therapy last night, and I got myself good and pissed about the situation. Why should I be the one begging her to come back to me when she's the one who crossed the line. For the last 2 months I've been jumping through hoops to try and keep this relationship alive, and all I've been doing is pushing her away. Last night I came to the conclusion that I was going to get through this with or without her. When I got home I sat down with her and told her I had weighed out what I thought she was trying to decide on, 12 years of memories, love, etc. vs. 1 year at her job and 6 months of friendship with this OM. I told her if she wasn't willing to work on getting through this to see where we could end up, then I wasn't willing to give her another month to think about it. I was truly content with either decision last night, I was that focused. She said she was willing to work to see if we COULD get through it, but she didn't want to promise that we WOULD get through it. I'm ok with that. I bought "Not Just Friends" last night, and I told her that if we were going to try, I expected her to educate herself on what she's going through by reading this book with me. I think she was a little taken back that I was willing to be the one to end it if she couldn't decide at this point what she wanted to do. I also told her if I thought for a second that she wasn't putting forth the same effort I was that I would end it, and I meant it. I feel like I gained a little of my dignity back last night. Now, after reading all of the good advice from this board, I have to put it to use. I will do 180's, Thought-Stop, GAL, etc. I WILL become attractive to her again. I WILL beat the OM at this. I WILL NOT let him have her without a fight. It's now time to focus on my changes...
