Even though it had poor reviews, I really liked it (it reminded me of Carson McCullers). It's about this extremely slick and dangerous con-man wheedling his way into a family and masterfully manipulating the other characters in the book. It's dark and has a bit too many subplots, but I found the con-man character and the psychology in this book kind of fascinating.
Anyhow... onto what you wrote... you probably did hit the nail on the head with the nurture/sympathy connection between your wife and her jailbird friend. A common need amongst women is to "feel needed," and it sounds like your wife feels that towards this OM.
There is no arriving, ever. It is all a continual becoming.
I thought I gently broke off relations with OW a couple of weeks ago, but she's called and left 2 messages on my voice mail saying she wants to get together this weekend. Even after two weeks apart from her, I can still smell her scent at times. Is that strange or what?
Anyway, I didn't really break it off for stbx reasons even though she went crazy about it, I did it because OW was getting to serious and I didn't want to hurt her. I don't feel the same way about her as she has said she feels towards me. She was always asking me... "what do you think about us"? I mean, WTF is she asking me with that question?
Anyway, I don't want to be with her long term, but she's hot and I'm trying to avoid the temptation of short term gratification. Oh, these thoughts crossing my mind are killing me. I really don't want to be a user, it's so shallow, but on the other hand.. (devil on right/angel on left shoulder), I've had worse scenarios to face. She's not the type that's just out looking for a good time, she's serious. Has anyone ever seen the movie.. My Super Ex Girlfriend? This sucks, how do you avoid this and politely tell her to go away?
Last edited by Astimegoeson; 02/21/0711:07 PM.
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare." -Mark Twain
why ruin a good thing? how about being completely honest and tell her just what you typed here? I don't want to hurt you, I don't want a serious relationship,, I'm just comin out of a marriage.
Then, hit her with the ole "Can we still just enjoy eachothers company from time to time"?
Just simply tell her that you are not ready for a long term or serious relationship. It really is that simple. If she continues to pester you then she is crazy and you just need to be flat out blunt with her. Not trying to be mean but you can only be nice for so long to some one then you will have to break the news in harsher words to get it through their thick skull.
Then Again...If she is hot....Oh wait that just the sexually deprive me talking here....
Your busy this weekend anyway...You have a lot of crap to move for me...
Ben 32 STBXW 29 3 kids (D1,S4,SD8) (1 dog 5months) Status: Fighting for the Kids.
"The only thing we know about future developments is that they will develope."
cuz that's all I'm really looking for right now...