Started chatting with some nice new Lady last night...
And she keeps asking me when she can Chat with me again... feels pretty good!
I got my 2nd "matching" Tattoo for my other arm this morning... I feel like I'm balanced out again... like just having the one on my left my right was missing something.
I'm going to go down Sat. and play golf with my BIL and then go to my their party that night!
Everyday this week I felt better and better... I'm back to the point I was at before my "Ex" came back and opened up this "Pandoras Box"...
Now... I don't care what she does... If she wants to be part of my life then she can take the steps to be part of it... As a friend or otherwise.
Came home went to the Gym because I had to skip my normal time during the day.
Chatted a lot with the new lady we exchanged Cell phone numbers and I’m going to be calling her soon tonight!
We Texted back and forth with each other all day Saturday while I was golfing with my Sister and BIL… was very fun!
Went back to Sis and BILs after golfing and had a BLAST at the Keg party… I drank a LOT of tequila and had a fun time… I love Tequila I can drink TONS of it and suffer no ill effects the next day other then a slight queasiness!
Took Sister and BIL out for breakfast then headed home tidied up my house and went to the Gym. Grabbed some groceries and BBQ’d myself up some Chicken and Beef Kabobs.
Ex dropped off the kids and we had a very productive yet heated fight…
First she asked about my new Tattoo and I showed her again... She complimented me on it
Then I told her about the arrangements I made with my parents to keep the kids so I could go on a vacation… I also told her that it bothered me that I had to do that with my kids so I could go on this trip.
She did not like the arrangements and explained why… She is going on one last Trip with her new “BF” this weekend and yet again she is “dumping” the kids off at her parents
I told her EXACTLY what I thought of that and I told her VERY clearly when she tried to tell me what she was doing with her “BF” that … “I DON’T F..King CARE and I don’t want to KNOW what you are doing”
She said it’s the last “trip” she knows school starts soon and it won’t work out that way anymore… She talked to “BF” and made it clear the kids will come first…
I replied I will believe that when I see it
She had applied for a Job in the city where her “BF” lives and was called back for a in person interview but it made her feel sick to think of moving there… I wont move there… at least not now… not anytime soon..
I replied well that’s a relief…
I told her it was sickening to me to see that she was more scared of loosing her “BF” then her kids or a man she had spent so much time with…
That it disgusted me that she said it would be a “step back” it the eyes of her family and friends to be back together with me… “Why would you GIVE a S..T what they think.. that saving a marriage would be way more important then their opinions
I also said to her that I felt like she has placed me into a “father” figure roll and I DON’T like that one bit… I am not your “daddy” and you should not even consider me in that way…
I said I did not feel like she was doing a very good job of being a “Friend” to me and I required more then what she has been doing if she wants to be my friend… a friend calls a friend comes over and hangs out a friend spends time with you…
She did not like that… and told me she would leave if I did not stop yelling…
I toned my voice down and said I’m sorry for yelling… but it’s the only way to get through to you it seems…
She replied I think I have said many things that I did not think out very well… They mean more then one thing…
She asked this: What do you mean by being a friend… a phone call to go out for an Ice cream… or…
I replied yes, or come over for supper or a movie… you on one couch me on another or us on one together… cuddling… being friends… I WON’T interfere with her new relationship… if your BF doesn’t get that you want to be close to your “EX” then he’s not the right guy for you… I am working on a new lady myself… you think I want to mess that up…
We are FRIENDS but that requires some effort on your part more then you are doing now.
She said I would like to think that we could be friends./.. but I have read the books you have given me… I worry that there is always this undercurrent of you trying to Us get back together… and that scares her
NOTE: She has read more of the DB books… that cannot be a bad thing even if it just helps her.
I replied Yes and no… I’m working on a new lady as I already said… she is interested in me and schedules times to talk with me it feels very good… so I am moving on… but Of course that is ALWAYS going to be there between us… you know it and feel it all the time and you miss me just as I miss you…
She said you know I don’t like when your mad at me I will do just about anything to have you not mad at me…
I said well I’m not going to stop being mad at you because when I am you are more interested in me… Think about it… you want to see me more and try to make me not mad with you and be happy with you…
She paused and thought… that’s… interesting
We hugged very closely. Things calmed down we chatted more and smoothed things out… I believe the friendship will progress and improve
If something happens between us it will be naturally and if we just end up as friends that is just fine to.
Either way I don’t care… I am going to be fine with or with out her.
