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GGB

"If you look back about a year and a half ago, I went on a stretch of nearly 3 months were it was 5x a week or more, and then it kind of petered out when #6 was born."

I can understand that, which is one of the many reasons we are NOT having #4.

"Can you feel when she's getting close and back off a bit?"

Yes I can by listening to her breathing, but those particular O's came so fast there was nothing I could do. Last night, I intentionally didn't stimulate the G-spot so that it would last longer, and she had a semi-intense O (although not as intense as the one in the shower or the one where I prolonged it for 20 minutes or so).

This does have me thinking though. Keeping her balanced using oral will be trickier. Any thoughts from the board members on how to keep track of her excitement level while doing oral?

Chrome

K

"Don't worry about the quick "o" - happens to me all the time. I can still have a really intense o again after that. The quick one is almost reflexive. So...as far as strategy is concerned I would let her have the quick one and then back "waaaaaaaaaaaaaay" off and tease her until she gets revved up again. Just back off the genitals and start over with the kissing, the breast etc... The next one will probably take longer and be much more intense. At least that is how it works for me. Sometimes my most intense o's have been after several less intense ones and me thinking that I couldn't possibly have another one left in me."

Sounds to me as if you and my W are very similar. She has said that just after the O, her genitals and breasts are too sensitive to be touched. So far we have just used stimulating me as a "break" between her O's. I think I may try backing off right after her first O, but not stopping completely, and then slowly ramping up to the next one. Thanks for the tip.

Chrome

Lou,

I have heard of something like that dilation thing you mentioned. If you can find the link it might be helpful. Thanks.

Chrome

"I suggest that you get a clear go ahead from your wife before you go for her genitals again after orgasming. Kind of like the non-verbal communication you might have with another driver at a four-way stop. An over-stimulated clit or g-spot is just not going to fire and is going to hurt."

I hear you and agree. So far, the non-verbal communication as to when I should touch genitalia has been me caressing her inner thighs with the occasional "swipe" at the nether regions. If the swipes seem to provoke a positive response (she gets really wiggly when she is happy about contact) I go for it. Of course, she has also grabbed my hand and shoved it down there a time or two as well. I guess that is a green light also.

"Another trick would be to go for indirect stimulation. This is something I love. Apply pressure downward on the pudendum rather than directly on the clit or use your tongue through some silk rather than directly on the skin or hump on top of some denim. The thicker the barrier, the more aggressively the pressure can be applied and this results in sort of a different tone to the orgasm. For instance, non-stop tongue directly to the clit would be a very high pitched orgasm whereas dry-humping through leather would be a very low pitch. Actually having something sizable inserted in the vagina while orgasming further lowers the tone but also adds much more muscular involvement which changes the whole vibration. If you can figure out how to hit many different erogenous zones at the same time while your wife is orgasming then you will be a sexual one man band"

THANKS!!!! Just what I was looking for. I like the use of the word pitch/tone, etc. So far the maximum I can handle is a quartet ... thumb on clit, middle finger on G-spot, tongue/lips on one nipple, fingers on other. With the occasional french kiss or neck bite thrown in for good measure. I wonder if it would also feel good if the other fingers massaged the labia. I guess I'll have to test it.

Chrome

Chrissy,

"Last night I heard the song Buttons and thought ohhh this song is so Chrome."

HEY!!! I resembled that remark. LOL

"Love the shower stories. That was always my favorite time to tell my H to drop his drawers."

What the heck was your H doing with his drawers on in the shower?

"Also love the fact that your not actually having sex with the wife. You are allowing her to get in touch with her sexuality and realize that it is not a bad thing and her pleasure is important to you. And I am sure the fact that there is no fear of the pain overriding her feelings at the moment is factoring in to that. Good for you letting it be mostly about her at the moment this also gives you a chance to try out new things that might increase her pleasure."

Wow. Hadn't thought of it that way. Works for me.

"Or keep stimulating while you kiss her belly all the way down until you can work your way down on her with out her realizing what you are about to do."

Hmmm. Think I can sneak in an oral, eh? I may have to go with the BF/Stig approach the first time (i.e. "Shhh, be quiet" or "STOP IT!" when she protests). It worked with sucking on her breasts in the cabin. Maybe ... just maybe.

"Or you can stimulate her clit with your penis its called having sex from the outside without ever penatrating her."

Thanks for the tip, but I'm going to side with Lil on that one. NO CHANCES!! Maybe later.

"When she is giving you a hand job suggest she alter and just lick the top of your head on and off."

She does that, and it feels d@mn good too. I do have this fantasy of being deep throated, but it ain't gonna happen. Shrug. Besides, there are lots of neat things that can be done with HJ's. Every heard of the "infinite vagina?"

"You can also use her breast tell her how awesome they are and how you would love to rub your ---- all over them. Breast milk be damned good lubrication."

ROTF. I like it

"Yes it is true some woman like myself get more riled the closer it gets to that time of month. But every month not just one. Factor in the fact she wants another baby and knows you are about to get snipped so her chances are fading fast. Flashing warning signs."

She stated that this was her first obvious ovulation since the pg, and as far as I know that is possible. I will be watching her behavior between ovulations and on the next one to see how things go. But I honestly think that she is being honest about her desires at this point.

"the girth would be like giving birth"

Yeah. I'm afraid to say that HJ's require both of her hands.

Chrome

NR,

I gotta run, but I do want to say that I will try to help (and all you other more experienced guys jump in too ... man, this is starting to get kinky ROTF).

I'll be back later to respond to your post and the others. Be well.

Chrome

Re Chrom
the link it might be helpful. Thanks.
www.Goodvibrations.com and http://www.soulsourceenterprises.com/ has larger ones . Lots of 5"L and 1.5"D found by Googeling.

Your W does not have the medical problems associated with painful intercourse but here are pages that describe some procedures and usages of dilators.

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/MIT/content/MIT_7_2X_Ways_of_Dealing_With_Specific_Sexual_Problems.asp?sitearea=MIT

http://www.bcforum.org/dry.html

http://www.cancer.org/docroot/MIT/content/MIT_7_2X_Keeping_Your_Sex_Life_Going.asp

http://www.breastcancer.org/intimacy_moves.html

These are cancer web sites where I have looked for information. Actual women with the problems post on some of these sites so there are suggestions to what works from users and sometimes MD type replies.
I am guessing if women with medical problems find some relief, your W w/o the actual medical problem should benefit.

I have looked at web pages that are similar to the fat burning pills sold on TV. I don't trust those recommendations or advice there.
Lou

Since the Chrome school is open, I would love a little advice on arousal technique. My W has developed a dislike of receiving oral, primarily because she feels guilty about the fact that she does not want to return the favor. Yes, a whole other discussion. None the less, oral is out (for now). Thus, when foreplay advanced to bits, I have to use manual techniques. At the moment, I use 3 different manual techniques that do the job, but take about 20 mins to get things warmed up. Even then, insertion is always painful, no matter how slowly I go. In fact, I have to continue arousal with manual stimulation while inserting or there is no hope. Yes, copious amounts of AstroGlide are always used too. Any way, a big complaint of my W’s is the pain of insertion. Oh, I am by no means Chrome sized either. I am just a pretty average really. Do any experts out there have any suggestions that might help?

Brian.

a womans arousal is not about the physical techniques so much. yeah being a good physical lover is something to work towards, but its far easier and more fun when there exists an atmosphere of intimacy/attraction/desire. besides from your post that doesnt seem to be the problem.

Chromos current success is not about his sexual skill level. Its about his manifesting certain behaviors that women respond too. Some of it is in relation to his male sexual drive. he is not apolgetic for it. His W became very affectionate and cuddly (something he used to think was impossible for her) after several months of doing things differently then he used to.

If you want desire from your W, your going to have to
1) discard what you think should work, cause it hasnt
2) learn what women find desireable and accept it
3) lose the fear that it wont work, cause its foreign to you
4) start doing it

in every one of your posts about you and your W, I see examples of placating and supplicating behavior. Dont be mad at her, for doing what worked to get a 'good H'. focus on you to doing what works to getting a 'good W'.


Chromo

man, this is starting to get kinky
everyones concept of kink is different.
for example having sex in public doesnt faze me in the slightest, but I wouldnt let a woman use a stap-on, on me. thats my definition of, too kinky, even if prostate stimulation purportedly does feel good.

So while most here dont mind talking about sex in a very specific manner, I dont see anyone trying to be kinky, inciteful, or otherwise instigate inappropriate behavior.

If you find it kinky, you might want to consider your spouses feelings, and whether they would find it acceptable, a breach of intimacy, or disrespectful.

Dr. Ruth talks about everything, but very few are going to find her delivery kinky or inappropriate.

Heather,

"I love this song Chrome. My H bought the CD. It is depressing isn't it?!"

It is quite a good song musically and lyrically. Whoever wrote it encapsulated angst about as well as I have ever heard it. It is a perfect expression of wasted passion, or maybe passion with nowhere to go but in ... and burn. To me, the best lines are

"playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home"

"Kicking shadows in the street for every mistake that I have made"

So your H bought the CD and gave it to you or he just bought it for himself and you listened to it?

Chrome