Not really looking for signs. I'm kinda being self absorbed right now. With the upcoming situation at work and the fact that I am going to have a lot of free time on my hands, I'm joining my colleges wrestling team. Yeah I know I'm a bit old (I'll be 29 in October)...but everyone is really behind me with the idea and it's given me something to focus on. It's helped me to stay focused in the gym and really eats up my time. So in all honesty this dark thing could last awhile.
I think you are doing the right thing. I am SO glad to hear about the wrestling thing and I think you have embraced the GAL thing to the max and it's paying off for you. Good for you.
No real news on the sitch. I'm finding it easier to deal with every day. I haven't been to or even driven by "our" house since before we went to court...about 3 weeks. I'm still very focused on me. I've registered for my fall classes and continue to be very focused in the gym.
The real reason I'm posting this is because now there is cause for worry about W's health. She had cists on her ovaries some time ago and had thought they came back or taht she she possibly has ovarian cancer. So she calls me today to ask if I can keep the kids tommorrow night (I had planned on last night and tonight) so she can go to the doctor. She said she spent last night in the hospital and they found cists on her kidney, which is causing it to not work properly. So tommorrow she goes to the doc to find out where to go from here. Hopefully we can get this taken care of with no real problems. I'll let you all know how it turns out.
you know, this might really wake her up and let her know who really truely cares for her and what she really wants in life. Not that I'm saying that if she has cancer it is a good thing, cause it's not, but God can work good out of all the bad.
again, God bless, crissy
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Today is going to be a very long day for me. Today is Sd10's and W's birthday...our first one apart in 8 years. I'm already not dealing well, only got about 3 and a half hours of sleep and can't seem to get anymore right now. I was doing pretty well detaching but lately I miss her so much, probably has alot to do with the date. I do have plans later so I should be able to stay occupied but this is going to be a rough day.
I hope everyone else gets to enjoy the holiday with friends/family. Take the kids to see fire works.
Sorry the day is rough for you. I know certain holidays and dates make things even more difficult for us. Hang in there and hopefully your plans will help you cope until a new day comes.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
I'm not really sure where I'm at right now. I've been doping alot of prtying...maybe to much but I've been having a blast. Next friday I'm taking my son to his first wrestling show (yeah I know it's fake but we like it). I've been spending alot of time working out...wrestling season will be here before I know it.
As far as W goes, I really don't know how I want that to turn out. I'm almost to the point where I might be the one who files for the D. I don't really want one but I think now that I would survive it, I've got alot going for myself that I didn't see before and I feeling alright now. I kinda feel like I need to close that chapter of my life before I can start the next one. I will update when things happen but really she does her thinga nd I do mine and that's it. No R talks no nothing.
