I find that this vacation we are both too tired still to flirt much. H made a few half hearted butt rubbs in bed last night to which I surmised I was supposed to then roll over and "f" him but I didn't. I wouldn't have minded a little ML but I'm not gonna be the only one in the game. I'm hoping that we will both be relaxed enough in a few days to have a "happy ending" to this vacation.
LFL and choc - you are too cute. Likewise, I find that I am rapidly working out more etc... as I strive to quit dragging H along for the ride that I envision as a sl - after all it is supposed ot be "our" sl not "my" sl. Maybe one day it will look a lot mre like "ours" than "mine" if I continue to be available but not to enable.
Karen, who doesn't know if the above sound lilke much fun
LFL and choc - you are too cute How can I resist a guy who has chocolate in his "name". I find that this vacation we are both too tired still to flirt much. That stinks. Although H and I are very good at flirting with each other and it still rarely leads to hot sex. But once again, "at least I've got that goin' for me" Sorry Baltoman! I hope you are enjoying the warm weather at least. It's still in the 30's here in NY. I'm dying to just be able to go outside without a coat. The less clothes the better
I'm convinced that we need to work out and do all of the "GAL" stuff just because we believe they are good for US, not for our SL or with any thought of reciprocation. I have tried the "He Who Cares the Least, Wins" thing, and it NEVER results in a "win" (at least if you define a "win" as a "if I don't initiate all of the time, then he/she will start stepping up and taking their rightful role in the SL).
I think it's kind of like doing good works in this Life. Do them because that's who you are, and that's what your values and your character are, and because it makes you feel good. Because if you're looking for reward, you're going to be bitterly disappointed.
Thanks, LFL for the validation on the dance analogy.
I'm curious about others' response to that analogy (sorry GEL, but I think this analogy really works up to a point)... how can I experience myself as fully sexual without a partner?
I don't mind analogies....I use them too. I only requested MoJo not use one in her explanation to me on that one thread only in that instance when she's responding to me about my question....I get bogged down in the analogies sometimes and the point is lost for me.
When I'm really trying to understand something I tend to grasp the point better when it's almost put in bullet point format LOL. So in order to understand her better, I communicated to her what I would need to "get it" better...so I could avoid going round and round on it in that instance and understand her point.
Ohhhhh how I agree. Part of my logic to move further south years ago! Oh wait it is only 43 outside hmmm but inside is in the 70s and tank top and undie weather lol.
Lost my post. I will try again. It was long and convaluted anyway.
Vacation? In a nutshell, it was fair. A C minus. I spent most my time with the little kids. H spent most of his time with the big kids. I woke with the baby in the am and was wiped out by midnight. H woke at 10 or 11, worked out and stayed up until 2 am with the teens. I barely saw H except for the one time we had sex and the one evening we went to dinner. I don't even think he saw me in my new bikini. How is that for suckage?
H may have realized that I found the experience less than ideal since he made sure to tell me that he is looking forward to our weekend away at the end of April. I'm not sure if I am or not.
I am debating whether this whole deal is worth a discussion. The list of mitigating circumstances that H will recite will be as follows: the Jeep broke down on the way and H lost a day, he went one night to pick up a couple of the college kids from the airport at midnight, the DS14 and his friend needed supervision so he couldn't just leave them to their own devices at midnight, he had to train for his triathlon (he took the 14 year olds along too), and finally, my period started toward the end of the week. All this added up to me being alone with the girls most of the time. The time I had with H was during dinner and in the evening watching DVDs.
I have a very sour taste in my mouth about the whole deal. As the baby and I did our 5 mile walk in the mornings, as we played on the beach with DD8, as I spent most of my time alone, men 20-40 years old assumed I was single and chatted me up, complimented me, gave me cute lines etc.. (My fave, "Did you two just step out of a bathtub full of rainbows this morning?") I just want to scream at H, "WHY DON'T YOU NOTICE ME? CLEARLY I AM NOT HIDEOUS SO WHAT IS THE GD PROBLEM?" It makes me afraid that at some point I will become vulnerable to an affair. I've said this before and I don't think it is imminent but how long can I take this?
On to Star Trek. As we were watching the other night, there was an episode where an alien seduces Dr. Crusher. Apparently, he has done the same throughout the ages with other women in her family and has drawn power from them etc... She has this dreamy, orgasmic look on her face whenever she is with him. Anyway, H says, "I wish I could make a woman look like that, preferably Karen." Well, how could he if he doesn't even try? The alien was, of course, a master of seduction...he knew what to say, what to do, how to look in her eyes, touch her until she was "quivering with desire" (a nod to the bodice ripper books we women love). Is all of this issue in this M that H sees himself as inept? Could that explain what happens here? What do I do with that? Then, every time I bring things up I am just making him feel like a failure and digging the hole further (which is, by the way, how these conversations feel to me). What the h*ll am I supposed to do?
It was directed at me and the baby in her stroller and I thought it was just too cute too! A young guy in his 20's said it as he was walking past. Made my day.
