My dad died this past weekend. Man the grief is crushing. It feels like someone literally carved something out of my body. He was a terrible alcoholic and yet we still adored him, funny eh.
It was a bizarre week. We decided to sell our home ourselves and sold it on the 3rd day after we plunked the sign in the yard. I handled all the negotiations (H cannot make or receive personal phone calls or emails at his new job) and it went great! I got 10K more than a realtor told me I would and it felt good to flex those long-dormant businesswoman muscles. The contract came in on Thurs night and my dad died the following morning so there was no time to celebrate. Oh well it's keeping me busy so that's good.
Thank you for all of your prayers. He went pretty quickly--told my mom he couldn't breathe and took two breaths and died.
I'm so sorry. I think the most helpful thing one of the hospice people said to me when my father died was that you grieve for someone because you love them and they are gone but when you are done grieving you will find that they are still here because whatever made you love them is what you have or will incorporate into your own life. For instance, you'll see something funny and think "That would have really made my Dad laugh." and realize that you're laughing just like him.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
I'm so sorry you are having to go through this, but I'm thankful that he went fairly quickly. It's so hard to deal with a loved ones death...even when you know it's coming.
WTG on the sale of your house though!!!! You should be proud of yourself on that....so should your husband.
You hang in there sis, you and your family are in my prayers.
You are an awesome woman. Good job on selling the house especially without help and with all that is going on. Do you have another house picked out?
I am very sorry to hear about your Dad. I cannot imagine how painful that must be.
If you need a cyber buddy, GEL has my email address and I have told her that she is free to forward it to you. I only wish that I lived where I could help you pack, take the kids for a while, bring a bottle of wine and a hug - whatever.
Goodness! Thank you for all the fast replies. I will remember all of them.
Yes we have another house picked out--Lou we got that one for 40K under the listing price but a realtor helped us with that sale. I worked in sales my prebabies career so I know the basics of selling something, just not the real estate lingo. Am learning it quickly tho! As soon as the wife walked through the house, I knew I had her. I made a mental note to hold firm on the house cause she loved it and would pay whatever I asked for, and she did. The hubby was a little harder to read but I heard him whisper "wow" when he went into the newly finished basement that H just completed last summer, so I suspected we had him, too.
I can't seem to process that he's gone. He was a larger than life presence and it's hard to imagine that gone. There is a family picture taken about 20 years ago (me with braces, niiiice) where he is surrounded by all his 'women' (mom and 5 daughters) and it looks for all the world like a prince with a harem. He thrived on our adoration.
H is comforting me just right. Staying up late and letting me reminisce, even asking questions and encouraging me to! He is doing everything perfectly and I'm so proud and relieved.
sad for you for now 