GEL, Thanks, and I applogize for being MIA. My dad was put in the hospital last Thursday and we are just getting back to routine. He is fine now, but it was pretty scary. His sodium level was so low the Dr.'s were suprised he hadn't gone in to a coma yet.
Any way, in the middle of all that, I did have my first C session Monday. It went well. She mostly asked questions. She thinks that it will be hard to accomplish anything though with out H there. We will be working on my coping with the sitch.
This was the first V-day that I didn't really care what the heck happened. Spending 4 days in the hosp with Dad wiped me out. H was nice enough to take me and S1 out for dinner, my FIL tagged along. It was actually a very nice night.
Nicky
"There are two types of people -- those who come into a room and say, 'Well, here I am,' and those who come in and say, 'Ah, there you are.'"
Frederick Collins
I'm glad to hear your dad is doing ok now, that wasn't a fun thing to go through I'm quite sure....it's always scary to have a loved one go through something like that.
My H was also resistent to going to the C at first with me. He did go with me, but only because I drew that serious line in the sand. H was afraid though that he was going to be ganged up on by me and the C. He was afraid it was going to be nothing but a blame finding mission and that he was going to be the target.
It really took some time, with my H really not talking much....for him to see I was looking for solutions, not trying to point the finger. That I was willing to hear how I was contributing to the problem too....and not place everything squarely in his lap as he thought would happen.
In order to have your H attend C'ing with you nicky....you might find you have to draw that line in the sand too, but you might try this first.
Perhaps after some time has passed you can ask him to just come with you and sit in on a session. Tell him he doesn't even necessarily have to say anything if he doesn't want to....but that you want him to see what goes on. If he will simply go, there's a good chance that at some point he'll find himself responding to something that is said....and THAT is a beginning.
