She has not really shown a genuine interest in losing weight until recently - she says even her 'fat' clothes are starting to feel tight. She is definitely at her all time heaviest (was always slim and fit in the past), and she complains about her weight all of the time. Now she says she wants to start a diet this month, so hopefully that will become a reality. She looks fine/attractive to me, but if this is what is causing her problems sleeping nude and contributing to her LD, then she really needs to do something about it. As a side note, she has never mentioned her body image as a reason for not sleeping nude.
Quote: As a side note, she has never mentioned her body image as a reason for not sleeping nude.
Oh well, maybe it's not an issue then.
As a woman, I can't imagine feeling sexy with an additional 40 pounds on me. Well, I take that back. I would still feel sexy but I wouldn't feel confident and secure of my attractiveness.
Again, that's me. Some people's weight fluctuates madly and it doesn't bother them.
Does she undress in front of you? Does she like the lights on or off if she is getting nude. Does she turn away from you when dressing, or taking her bra off.
I believe that body image is possible the #1 contributing factor to LD. How can they feel sexy if they don't believe that they look sexy? Some women adjust to this as they age, they don't let their looks bother them, they keep their sexual confidence (wish I had one), but it seems that for other women, as they age, they completely lose their sexual confidence and then they try to hide from us.
This HD W would like to report that in the winter she goes to bed in long-sleeved top and pajama pants, zip up sweatshirt with hood, and big fluffy socks. Sexy. I don't like to be cold.
What kind of bed sheets are you using? Why not use flannel sheets and a good comfortor to make a nice warm environment and then go naked under the covers!
Oh I have those too Cemar. You should see the comforter on our bed. This thing weighs about 50 lbs and could keep you warm outside at the North Pole. It's like a huge heavy duty sleeping bag. H thinks I'm nuts. I will literally keep my hooded sweatshirt on all night sometimes. I think it does hinder our sex life. I don't want to get undressed because I'll be too cold! OR I'll keep my top on. Or have the comforter up over us while we are doing it. Lol. Summer is always better. I feel much sexier in the warmer months.
LFL, I know for a fact it hindered our sex life. I am freezing all the time too, but I am able to stand it with flannel sheets and an electric blanket cranked all the way up. Even then sometimes I put a sweatshirt on but always always leave the bottoms off. Gotta have that easy access thing goin on.
H is a furnace and doesn't mind the cooler weather. He is even getting to the point that I can snuggle up to him at night and...gasp...TOUCH him and he's fine with it! Used to be that he'd get mad and testy, etc.
Another tactic of mine is to come to bed naked and seduce him, then cover up to go to sleep. Ah the HD mind is so crafty. lol
She does not undress or change in front of me. We also used to shower together frequently but she no longer seems interested in this. I would agree that poor body image is a very high factor in LD women, but I suppose it could be a factor in men as well. This is an especially frustrating area to me because she seemed to be in great shape for most of her life until the last two years. Again, she looks sexy/attractive to me now, but it doesn't matter if she doesn't find herself to look like this. I feel like this is just a matter of getting comfortable with one's partner and another way of taking them for granted (I can almost guarantee that she would still be in great shape if she was single or in the early stages of a different relationship).
