Quote: ...I mean, think of it, one of the most critical things you can say about someone (especially a child) is that "he just wants attention" like it's some kind of crime to want people to look at you, listen to you, and respond to you.
LOL,
You know thats too funny. In my reply I had actually typed out "Feels a little like HEY LOOK AT ME, LOOK AT ME." And then hit the backspace key.
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
Journaling continues : Captian's Log, star date 2005...
After last weeks appearent prgress, this week seems to be back to more of the same. I had the good intention of letting my W know about the positive changes in her that I noticed last week. However, Tuesday evening she mentioned to me that since starting the new medication, she hadn't noticed or felt any real difference in herself. I told her that I had a different view. That last week I has noticed an improvement and the she seemd to have more energy, and was doing more things around the house and even doing some until later in the evening and that I was really proud of her. She acknowledged the points I mentioned, but said she still felt pretty much the same, just sort of blah and no energy for anything. She said that she wanted to call her doctor about this. I asked her if her doctor told her how long the lag time was after beginning to take the med, that some meds need a last a few weeks to build up in the body before its effects are noticed. She said no and wanted to find that out from her doctor because its been two weeks and she really doesn't feel any different.
Tuesday's is the night my D goes to scouts. I had hoped for a little "alone time" that night, but D is down with a cold and didn't go to school so that plan was out. W and I went to bed around 10 and layed there for a bit with the TV on, then I rolled towards her gave her a nice kiss and asked her if she wanted to fool around. She said no, not really, that she was tired. A first I felt that rejection resentment beginning to build, but I smushed down. I said nicely, "Well how about another time" (We always seem to say tomorrow and that never comes). I paused and followed it a little more confidently with "My pick". She said "We'll see". Wanted to say someting like, "Well your loss" or "You don't know what your missing", but I didn't. So I just said good night and I told her I loved her, rolled over and went to sleep.
She placed a call yesterday to her doctors office, but they haven't called back. So we wait. After feeling pretty good this time a week ago, having ML for the first time in a long time and seeing what I thought were some physical improvements in my W. This week I'm a bit down and feel more like... One Step up and two steps back.
I'm going over to my buddy's house after work today, to help him with a survey realted issue, and then we'll jam on our acoustic guitars for a while in the back porch and have a few beers. Look foreward to that.
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
Quick update before a few days off from work. I'll spend some QT with my W today as we make for the mall(s) to help Santa fill his Sack-O-Goodies.
Finger tips are a little sore this morning, but my sole (musical part) is recharged following last night's little laid back jam session at my friends house. D@amn that felt good!
However, my W told me that her doctor finally returned the call to answer the question about her new medication. Bottom line, don't expect to see any noticable changes for awhile. It may take 4 - 6 weeks before we can see any notable results...
I think I'll make some time for "Me" this weekend too. I could stand to play my 6 string a bit and get lost in some music for awhile...
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
Journaling. Well, I didn't get around to playing last weekend like I told myself I'd do. But it's near the top of "my" to do list so maybe I'll get some quite time this weekend (ha, yeah right).
Chapter _.
Spent last Friday w/ my W and we tried finishing up the last of our gift shopping. My W's energy seemed to be hold throughout the day and we had a good time together. On Sunday our D10 was out w/ my sister, her BF and my dad, while we stayed home. I thought that this would be an oppertunity for some more EC time and maybe some ML. However as the day progressed, it became evident that it would be another SS day together. At one point during the day, as she was making more of the those darn peanut butter cookies, she said that she was going to finish that batch and take a shower (possible keyword to me). I said how about I run you a nice hot bath where you can relax and then we can go ML. To which I got that look again and I wish I knew how to describe it. It's sort or a cross between "hmmm...maybe, we'll see" and "you got to be kidding", smooshed together at the same time. Is it one of those pursual tests that Blackie referred to? I don't know. I'll be first to admit my women-eese is very rusty...
Time past by when she did finally jump into the shower. But by then D10 was due home very shortly and we needed to start dinner. I did ask her why she waited so long to get into the shower. She said that she didn't know if I meant ML right after shower or later that evening. I told her I meant right after shower, just like I said. And added, that both of us would be too tired, as usual, if we waited until later that night.
So, I guess in this instance, the lack-o-nookie is attributed to poor communication. One person saying one thing and the other person hearing another.
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
Thats enough of them there damn cookies. Im going to run you a bath and you are going to get squeaky clean and smooth and then I am going to eat YOU like a cookie.
<lick lips laciviously> ---> say that 10 x fast.
her response....a look hmmm...maybe, we'll see" and "you got to be kidding", smooshed together at the same time
you respond comon lets get cracking. your gonna procrastinate and miss out on another chance at all this excellent snookiness.
Something like that. humourous, macho, goofy. calibrate. personalize. have fun.
I've been continuing to take mental notes on my W's actions since she began her new med's. But after my first weeks report of instantly seeing some improvements, the last week or two seems to have been replaced with more of the same ol, same ol.
So last night as she was taking her med's, I asked her how was she feeling lately? That it has been almost a month now and I wondered if she felt or noticed any difference in her self. To which she said "it's not a month, it's only been 3 weeks". I looked at the calendar, and said that she started taking them the weekend of Thanksgiving, and that's nearly a month. Besides, that wasn't the question. I simply asked if she was feeling better. As she began counting the number of pills left in her thirty day supply and going on about the exact number of days equated to 3 weeks and a day or so. Then she added that she's missed a few days and still has 8 left, so it may not even be three weeks.
I said fine, so I'm off by few days, it's not a month, it's more that three weeks by my account and we're splitting hairs here and again, that wasn't my question. I just wanted to know how your doing. She said it's too early to tell, and that I knew that her Dr. told her that it could take 4 - 6 weeks before there is any noticable change. So I said, "So, what your telling me is that I need to wait until after a month has gone by to ask you if your feeling any better yet"? She said "Yes'.
Grrrr..... So much for simple questions and the fine art of effective communication.
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
D$amn, your either up way past you bed time or way too early for your time zone.
Your right, wasn't very "confident" and didn't equal "attraction". I DO do need respond more playfully and have more fun with it. I need to be more assertive, pick up the proverbial "rope" and swing it around a bit.
She said something about wanting a "Whopper" while watching the tube the other night right after she had just seen a commercial for Burger King. I brought her a taste of chicken from the kitchen and "I've gotta whopper for you".
She said " I knew you were going to say that". I just smiled.
A moment later, she was in the kitchen and referring to the crispy skin on the freshly roasted chicken, said "it's hard too".
To which I couldn't help but reply, "Just the way you like it Sweetie".
Quote: Something like that. humourous, macho, goofy.
I'm heading in the right direction. And I'll have fun with it along the way.
Thanks BF.
Last edited by snookchaser; 12/22/0511:23 AM.
"And wrinkles only go where the smiles have been." J. Buffett
Thats enough of them there damn cookies. Im going to run you a bath and you are going to get squeaky clean and smooth and then I am going to eat YOU like a cookie.
<lick lips laciviously> ---> say that 10 x fast.
Hmmm...I don't know BF. May be too many steps ahead (just like in chess, that was you wasn't it?). I mean, that tactic would work on me but I'm the HD and I like the man to be assertive/aggressive. If you are dealing with a LD/ND and on top of that, dealing with mental health issues, meds, etc, it is just not as easy as that. My H was in that place in the past and if I had attempted what you suggested he would have flat out refused. My guess is you are going to say that is because the woman cannot lead like the man but I think it is deeper than that. The mental health issues/sexual repression issues trump the gender issues. Anyways, Snook, you are in a tough situation. May just need to wait it out another month and see if the meds are effective at all. Stinks, but may be more realistic.
See, I liked blackie's approach. It may not have worked, but the tentative approach didn't work either, so you may as well take the rejection while you are acting assertive and attractive, and thereby make her question herself, rather than have her thinking Yep I don't want any part of that....when she perceives you as being weak or placating.
Snook, fwiw, I think she was waiting to see if you'd kick it up a notch. Steal her away, all that romance novel jazz.
Now, take what I say with a grain of salt because I am a dyed in the wool HD woman. However, the look she gave you clearly illustrated that she was intrigued by what you said, and so it wasn't that she was just flat out uninterested and stalling.
