Is this a good place to do something different? Maybe kiss him on the end of his nose? Maybe not take the initiative--although that's really hard. Something else to shake it up a little.
Today I will take it easy. I will accept that I've made mistakes in the past. I will also accept that I did the best I could.
Maybe I wish I had made different decisions or handled things differently. But wishes don't change the past. I can only begin making changes today. I will accept myself, knowing that I did my best. I did what I thought I had to do.
I am, and have always been, worthy of being loved the way I want to be loved.
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Not much to add lately. Things are going so well with H and I! We went bowling with some friends on Sat nite and had a great time. The couple we went out with is someone who I met on DB, so its really nice to see how far our lives have come since we met last August! Her and her H doing really well too! Sunday we went to Broncos football game and had such a good time! We laughed, joked, talked..its so nice!
Yesterday, H was in a "mood". I know it had nothing to do with me, so I just let it blow by, but as hard as it is, it still makes me wonder, "did he talk to OW? is this some type of anniversary for them that he is remembering? etc.." I know its not, but still, its a habit and I hope someday, it will go away!
It's funny how we try to read into things, figure out their moods. Here in MN there are men all over the state in "moods." The Vikings Su@k and hearts are breaking.
Each experience in life has formed me, become part of me, made me stronger.
Hey all! Sorry I have been gone for a while. H ended up finding my posts and read them, due to my sneakiness about the wedding and all. He was very upset with me...and I totally understood this. We had a very good talk about it and about a lot of things. I think we are heading in a very good place right now. And honestly, I think I need to start going to my H with things instead of coming here. It doesnt solve anything when I come here to vent and then feel better and then just let it go without talking to my H about it. I told him that too....I said that we both need to start coming to each other if there is someting we want to talk about or know. This secretness or snooping is definately not a good way to do things.
In our talk, I told him that I forgive him for everything, I love him and that I am happy. I think he was worried about all of those things. He seems much more at ease than he was before and hopefully we can start to move forward together now!
Excellent! You made the best of a difficult situation, and you're both going to be thankful for it! Just keep us posted on how you're doing--we look to you for guidance and inspiration.
You can feel only your own feelings, not another person's.
Having empathy for those we love, and being able to share their joys and sorrows, is part of our nature as warm, caring human beings. Taken to an extreme, however, too much empathy can mean that we lose our boundaries as emotionally separate individuals. When that happens, nobody wins.
We're responsible for our own feelings. If we're too deeply involved in another person's emotional state, we may not be truly aware of our own feelings. If we take on someone else's response to a situation, we lose our own in the process.
In any situation, particularly one that is highly charged with negative emotions, we need to maintain a sense of self. If we allow ourselves to be swept up in the anger, fear, grief, or despair of someone close to us, we become less capable of giving help and support. Emotional maturity is one of the goals of recovery. We progress toward it as we differentiate how we feel from how another person appears to feel.
I can respect the feelings of others without making them my own.
2much- your thread has been idle for a while. Can't you post with your H knowledge openly. Just tell how the DB priciples play into how you act and feel
