Ya know...for me it depends on the man. Facial hair just doesn't look good on everyone. My H happens to have a moustache and it looks great on him. He's the only man I've been with though that has had facial hair.
She looked at me again this morning, and said I looked like a terrorist. She said beards and mustaches are kind of "creepy." She said, "you say you want intimacy and closeness, but I will tell you that I don't think I'll be kissing you much if your have a beard." Of course, she wasn't kissing me much anyway, so I doubt I'll even notice.
As for missing my chance to say, "So, you found me attractive withOUT facial hair?", I assume that the issue is not whether or not she finds me attractive. It is whether or not she wants to grace me with her touch, or grace me with the privilege of touching her. I have no control over her in this respect, so I might as well do things for my own entertainment/amusement, such as, growing a beard, roasting my own coffee, reading, riding my bike, playing with the kids, etc.
So did you take that opportunity to let her know...she wasn't doing much with you without the beard? Just out of curiosity have you asked her how frequently she feels she does show you affection? I find that my H tends to loose track of time, he thinks we ML only just a couple of days ago....then I remind him that it's actually been 3-weeks or so, his response is sometimes "are you sure?".
I'm also wondering if you can now use your facial hair and the possible parting of ways with it....to try to make a point. That point being....you weren't responding to me without the facial hair, if I get rid of this now...what will be different?
Just some randome thoughts out of a terribly sleepy mom who stayed up with her 2-yr old all night...due to the fact that for some odd reason he decided it was fun to be nocturnal.
Your idea about using the facial hair and possible "parting of ways with it" was interesting, especially since I've already kind of tried it. I stopped shaving the day we left on vacation. We went out for dinner without the kids on Thursday night, after six days' growth. I said, before our date, "hey, if I shave this off, how about some more kisses?" She replied, "well, no promises." And it's good that no promises were made. I shaved it off, and only had the usual good night kisses and maybe a good morning kiss or two after that.
It reminds me of when I quit smoking. She hated the smell of it on my breath, and she said, specifically, that if I quit, she would likely kiss me more. So I quit. Did she kiss me more? Probably....it went from every few days to maybe once a day.
Now, I realize that quitting smoking was a good thing for many reasons, most of which relate to my health, to the example I set for my kids, to my finances, but the main reason for me, as an HD male, that finally made me quit was the hope that I would get more kisses from my wife.
So she's played that card before and I fell for it then. I will shave it off if and when I decide to based on what I want for Hairdog.
I vote yes on the beard as long as you go all the way with the "lumberjack fantasy" and wear the worn flannel shirt and the steel-toe leather boots too. Of course, you must also have rock-hard biceps from chopping wood all day that strain at the soft cloth of your shirt which is rolled up above your elbows revealing the wiry hair on your tan arms as you grip the axe in your large stong hands and....
..to be continued in my post-Alaska trip post.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Hairy, Tell me more about roasting your own coffee.
As you folks know, I'm nursing and allow myself one steaming cuppa joe and one half of a beer each day. Therefore, I try to make it the best cuppa and beer possible so I can savor it. I don't buy new clothes for myself, or go on fancy trips to AK ( ), etc, but I do allow these two luxuries in my day. And I look forward to them.
Do you roast them in your oven? Does the coffee taste fresher? What's the benefit?
I first started roasting my own coffee after reading about it and researching it online. I used a $5 popcorn popper I found at a thrift store. I finally bought an iRoast, which is essentially a heavy duty, digitally timed, temperature controlled popcorn popper. It runs about $160. You can buy your green coffee beans from online sources, such as sweetmarias.com. They have articles about popcorn poppers and other methods, too. Also, coffeegeek.com has a coffee roaster forum. I'm always worried that I'll post something there about my SSM, but so far, so good.
Does it make a difference? Oh yeah. Better, fresher taste. It is actually cheaper than buying roasted beans at the store (if you know the right sources), and those store beans may have been sitting around for weeks. Plus, there is the brag factor.
The iRoast sounds vaguely geeky but if you say the coffee is better, I'll take your word for it.
That is another thing for me to look into. I had to put the homebrew biz on ice for a while, until our financial situation is settled and MrHP is gainfully and happily employed. I don't think the initial investment will be all that much (perhaps a couple hundred dollars, less if I shop wisely) but that is so friggin much money to a one income family with a housefull of rugrats, kwim.
MrHP woke up this morning uncharacteristically optimistic. He said, I have faith that I'm going to get a better job--I just know it!
He was almost jubilant when he said this. I was still half asleep and replied, Okaaaaaaaay. (picture a groggy response rather than sarcastic. The ok was drug out because I'm not good at speech before 7:30 a.m.)
So there ya go. Maybe someday soon I'll be joining you in the realm of CoffeeGeeks.
Just curious: Does your W enjoy the fresh roasting as well? I found that having a common interest, even something small like this, really helps to promote that feeling of solidarity. Like, WE are coffee geeks, instead of my hairy, bearded, horny husband is a coffee geek and I tolerate it.
I think I'll check out ebay for a coffee roaster and see what I can find. Although I just won an auction this morning for tinting gels. The kind where you tint black and white photographs. Yeah. I've never done this in my life and I betcha it will end up in the heap of things that I flit through in life, sure that this next thing will capture my interest for longer than a year or so. Oh well, I will surely get a few good pictures out of it so that is worth the 7.00 that I spent.
