I decided to even apply to some outer Detroit area jobs. (I must be crazy....I hate that drive )
But in doing so, I just gave myself another PMA boost. My best paying jobs were from that area in the past and most of the ones I am applying to now will cover relo costs!
I was looking up a couple of my references, one was out of the country last week and the other one I don't currently use, since I know he is now longer available. Anyways, I'm rambling here now, the excitement has bit me, both of the companies are currently hiring for someone w/my background.
The one is a manager in that dept and has been known to hire people he has worked w/before. I just hope he gets back in from Mexico soon! The other may not be there anymore, but he held a high position (I was escorted in and out of the building the last time we went to lunch. I almost thought I was going to get frisked!) and his name will have some weight. Wish me luck!
A much more comfortable convo than in the past. He called to ask about s8's bday and will send money out this weekend if I've decided what to get him. I was able to tell him that I am waiting a bit to see where we are moving before I plan what to get him. (originally I had planned on getting him a bike, now I wonder if we will have space to use it after a move) Or should I still get him one? I was kind of hoping that ex would come up here for the bday, but I didn't suggest that.
I did say something about him waiting until we were gone to call on Sunday and he said he did try in the morning. (eheh, wrong!) but I let that be. Told him about the interview in Chicago and that I'm not taking it due to the location. He seemed interested in my life this time and said he understood! and then it was about the bday coming up, I did tell him I'm getting s8 some movies (his fave gift!) and ex kept saying he will help out. He called from work (which is a first in a long time) and we talked for 20 min! before he had to get off the phone.
I had a phone call in the middle of the night, the number looked slightly familiar but I didn't answer. This morning I have an email from who I thought it might be, but this is really weird!
I haven't heard anything back from her and I am holding out on calling her yet. She can be prone to gossip, so I don't want to act anxious in hearing whatever her problem is.
But that is part of the problem, not knowing what this could be about. I would never say we were close, but since I would be taking care of her k's at times, I would keep it friendly between us. We haven't talked since before the div tho.
The call from her being after midnight is puzzling. I would have blown that off but she called again at 6 am, (I had shut off the phone tho!) I do know that she talks more regularly to ex than I do, but she could be calling about something totally unrelated to him.
So, I am keeping my PMA up! (have to!) and looking at the glass half full yet. Whatever she is looking to tell me will probably get back to him and I don't want any negatives at this point.
I've seen a lot of positives from ex in just the last two weeks, (a few negatives, but not many!) and think we are in a good trend right now. I have just stepped back from the sitch to make sure I don't over react w/whatever happens next.
No new developments on jobs yet either. I sent off a good 20 resumes yesterday to jobs in Michigan, but many of the automakers are on shutdown this week. (yearly changeover) I'll probably send a few more out today and tomorrow, and keep the momentum going.
So, Gabe, I am just hanging here! But w/a positive attitude! T
hope every1's life is going better than mine at the moment. The ex's ex finally called me back tonight and we talked for quite a while. (but we have sworn secrecy in any of this getting out)
j/k, I can't tell ex that we talked and she has promised the same, which from my end doesn't really matter if she did go back on her word and tell.
Anyways, the story is that my 14yo ss was just put into foster care. He's been misbehaving terribly for his mother and is trying everything to go back and live w/his dad(ex). He had come to live w/us for 9 months before div was filed and I didn't have any problems. But it seems that ex has filled his head full of stuff. (I didn't see all of this, but am not sure what or who to believe right now.)
She filled me in on a lot of things that have been going on recently, which either her or ex is lying about. Ex had told me she had moved up to Mich for the summer and he had the k's every other weekend. She says no, she has taken a couple of long weekends to see her mother and couldn't take the k's since ex was working too much to have them. He had also said she was having marital problems and she says no, her H is right here and can confirm this. And she said when she stopped to see ex one time, he wouldn't let her go in the house.
Ss14 isn't really a bad kid, I do know that when he was around his dad he could get away w/too much but he just keeps getting in trouble when he's w/mom. (She has 4 other kids) Ex says he would be happy to take him, but hasn't made any efforts to make the trip to go to court. His reasoning, (she says) is that it would only be him and this other person and they could handle the anger.
She couldn't remember the op's name, but is sure it is female. Said he told her something about meeting an acquantance at Walmart. And that's all he would tell her.
So, now I have to figure out how to handle this. It does seem like he may be lying to me which makes no sense unless he is trying to string me along until he sees if this person works out. Now that he may have an OW in his life, I feel more determination to move back and make him own up to it. Am I crazy or what?
I did mention to ex's ex that if we were still together, I would take the boy in for her. She is frustrated at the moment (her 3yo was diagnosed w/speech delays) and I have always been more of the disciplinarian than ex. But she just kept asking me do I really want to go back w/him after the mind games?
Quote: Now that he may have an OW in his life, I feel more determination to move back and make him own up to it. Am I crazy or what?
I meant to say, that I want him to own up to the lies if that's what they are.
And I want him to see my PMA and Gal efforts even more now.
Until I get the full story, I don't know if there really is someone else or not. At times I have suspected an OW and now I only have tainted confirmation of it.
The hardest thing for me to let go of tonight, is the lying. His ex was very believable on some things she said, (this had to do w/k's not ow) and it is just leading to my confusion. I don't know who to trust at the moment. (other than myself and fellow bb members. )
But I am still going to focus on the job issue. And I will still favor Michigan strongly on this, as I have family and s8 will see his dad. I will have to work more diligently on that, as I see him as a WA dad to 3 of his k's now.
And for now I may just step back on showing any interest in him. (can't change my attitude too much as he will wonder what has happened!) I keep thinking of all the positives that I seen last week, and will just let him keep making the effort! T
Thanks for sharing that info. It paints your sitch as a bit more complex than how I first pictured it.
H is gonna need a good amt of time to sort out this mess. I'd imagine lots of guilt and worry, and the use of distraction (Ex: OW) to deal w/ it now.
Your role of being the stable one, keeping your household intact, and pursuing great jobs, is key. T, what sort of personal changes have you tried - in terms of appearance, dress? Anything that will turn H's head or make him go 'hmmmm!'? Also, have you been able to keep your PMA in his presence?
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