Here's an idea. The LDFolk are always saying that it's just hard for them to remember to think about sex or how long it's been since they last participated in any. What if the HD partner were to get a series of t-shirts made up with different numbers on them. When you just had sex yesterday, you wear your bright, happy yellow #1 shirt. As the numbers got higher the t-shirt colors would be more somber until you reached the number that would be represented by the black t-shirt. Once you got past the black t-shirt stage, you could tell your spouse that you were going to the tattoo parlor to have the next number applied to your *ss if you don't get laid that evening. You could tell the kids that the number represents how bad of a mood you are in that day.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Sounds good in theory, but I suspect Mrs.GGB would take it as pressure to have sex and it would become yet another reason to not put out
It would only take me a few days to get to the black shirt. I find my mood deteriorates rapidly after day 2. I try to fight the moodiness now that I know it affects her, but gosh darnit, it gets hard some days.
Quote: how long it had been since you last had sex- some sort of meter on your forehead?
JJ, I like your idea and the "shades", yellow to black too. It might work on LDH's but what about us HDH with LDW. I suspect like HairDogs wife, LDW will stick together to prove they are right.
How about we all have an "In the mood" bracelet that changes colors according to the sexual excitement we feel at the moment. Sometimes couples are in the mood on many days but at different hours of the day. It happened to us.
Quote: (1) I am too scatter-brained to carry on an intrigue...(2).I might go LD if my only option is bald, paunchy and suffering from ED.......(3) Do you mean to imply that techno-nerds, self-employed loners and SAHMs with cling-on toddlers are less sexy than the general population?......
1. I would have a difficult time covering up almost anything I did. 2. JJ, not all older guys are bald (you think hair has anything to do with sexual desire?), have ED, I will admit to a little paunch though. Are women with a little "back" less sexy? Only for picky people. 3. We are not less sexy. Maybe we might express sexyness a little different than some people.
JJ I am not comparing myself to anyone for any reason other than to say if you really believe 1, 2, and 3 above, here is my take on those items.
LP
Quote: at least the cry of "Come to bed! You've been on that dammed computer ALL NIGHT!"
I'm Guilty Lil. The internet helps me to solve problems but also causes problems. I get inspiration/help here but also feel like I am addicted to this site sometimes. HP
Quote: I can testify firsthand to how strong the temptation can get when your needs are not being met at home, but it is still not the logical 'next step', imo.
I feel this way too HP. The logical next step for me was to try fix what I/we have and if it works that is the main goal. But if it does not, at least fix the current relationship as much as possible so some of your problems will hopefully not follow.
Quote: I might go LD if my only option is bald, paunchy and suffering from ED
JJ I have to bust you here. If you and Sylvester Stallone (not the movie guy but the book guy) were single and interested in you, I bet you would melt.
Sylvester Stallone was born in July of 1946 so he will soon be 59. Just wanted to point out there are some Hank type guys, over 35 out there. BTW, don't do much looking at KFC especially if they have a "all you can eat" menu option.
Quote: I might go LD if my only option is bald, paunchy and suffering from ED
I didn't really mean this. I was just thinking about the odd phenomenon that makes me think my H still looks 25 though really he's 41. I said something to my sister the other day about my H looking young for his age and she said "He really doesn't. He's skinny but he's pretty wrinkly too.".
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
JJ, I didn't know if you were feeling most men over 40 were bald, paunchy, and suffering from ED and gave up on men in general. I see the paunchy and to a lesser extent the bald but don't know what bald has to do with actual sex drive. I think hair looks better than bald, but assume this could be over come if everything else is in place. This post is not implying you to look either. DB is about making changes to improve the M.
I suppose I posted the Sylvester Stallone example because I should do more of the things he does to keep in shape. I am not a "Rocky" fan but do enjoy hearing Stallone talk about his life and the things he has done with it.
About your thread, your H mentioning trading sex for getting out of chores seems the opposite of what the HDH (HD, GGB, Lou, and others)have. It sounded so strange to me as as SSH. We are alys hoping that doing an extra chore will lead to something. I gusee that is "stinking thinking." Well, I sometimes get a thank you and a smile most of the time.
Last week my back really hurt and I was thinking about how I coud get lucky . Then I saw a post about building a handi-cap (HC) ramp to a vagina. It was one of those moments that would have passed by, but because I was thinking about parking in a HC spot at WallMart, but didn't have a HC permit. When I got home I read the ramp post. I laughed so hard it hurt.
Just for fun. BTW, I still don't pass your Zorba the Greek test but my mind leans that way like a lot of other guys.
I am glad to hear you are still working over Mr. JJ to get what you want. Same best wishes to all other HDW's with LDH's.
Quote: About your thread, your H mentioning trading sex for getting out of chores seems the opposite of what the HDH (HD, GGB, Lou, and others)have. It sounded so strange to me as as SSH. We are alys hoping that doing an extra chore will lead to something. I gusee that is "stinking thinking." Well, I sometimes get a thank you and a smile most of the time.
I have to admit that one of the main things I like about my imaginary lover Hank is that he is always doing things like building me some new bookshelves to thank me for doing his french maid costume fantasy. Since I've joined this BB, I've learned that there are a lot of women in my situation but it still feels kind of bizarro world sometimes. It's not just that society taught me that a man should want to have sex with me, it was my actual personal experience before I married my H.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Quote: but it still feels kind of bizarro world sometimes
bizarro world for me too seeing HDW's after hearing so many LDW's stories.
I hear about guys having an exciting SL but wondered where all the women were they were having that great SL with. I guess I missed out trying to be a gentleman to the girls I did date occasionally.
I don't have an imaginary woman in a french maid costume fantasy or an imaginary female friend in another costume. Do they help or just make feel how much you are missing?
I do consider cyber contacts as friends though. Difficult to get into the fantasy when you know you can't do much about it because of your ethics that say what is right or wrong.
No matter what he may really look like, my mind superimposes this image of him as a young, handsome studly guy over him.
I know, intellectually, that he's been looking a little skinny lately, but it wasn't until my MIL sent him home last night with cinnamon rolls and barbecued beef saying that he was too "thin" that I realized Wow he must be downright gaunt. (she is not the type of person to come right out and say something negative about one of her kids--she leaves that up to FIL, lol)
However, I still see him as this perfect specimen of a man and love to look at him. Otoh, he likes the way I look but is not truly turned on by me, on a regular basis, until I am stick thin. This sorta pisses me off until I remember that number one, he is not doing it on purpose and number two, he has no control over the fact that I think he's perfect.
. Then I saw a post about building a handi-cap (HC) ramp to a vagina. It was one of those moments that would have passed by, but because I was thinking about parking in a HC spot at WallMart, but didn't have a HC permit. When I got home I read the ramp post. I laughed so hard it hurt.