Good news about the townhouse. It will be nice to be in a bigger place for you and the kids.
Are you detaching and GAL???? What are you doing for Russ??? Try to not let what your WAw said about your new place bother you. She may be jealous that you are using your $ to buy it and not giving her what she wants. You can't figure out what she is thinking, so don't try. I have learned that with my H. I just don't spend a lot of time thinking about why he does certain things. It helps with PMA if you don't dwell on those things. It just leads to more thoughts and they are usually depressing!!
Hang in there. Do something for Russ, you deserve it!! Sherry
I am doing lots for me, bought a king size bed and very expensive sheets, and two sheep from Serta for the kids,
I have been training lots. back down to my ironman weight. running is going ok, have not done any races. have two tri in June, one in July and one in Aug.
I had a similar thought - to replace the king-size bed that W sold after asking me to move out with a new one when I move back into our house (I bought her out of it). My thought was that this would be more comfortable for me, but would also signal that I was moving on, perhaps even relationally. It seemed important, as XW had offered me a small fullsize bed to have instead - seemed like a strong suggestion for me to be living solo, and I'm not sure her being comfortable with that idea is a good one.
I admire your getting a new place so quickly. I'll have my place back sometime in August. That won't come soon enough and will be good for my son, too.
Kids had cold and runny noises for the weekend, Summer is here now with temp up to 32.
Took at subject off the new place and will close on the 10th of June. I have bought the furnature and the appliances and new beds. I still feel like something is missing, you know how you put up a strong front but are really weak inside.
Should be a fun week leading up to the "man of steel triathalon" on Saturday. have the kids Tueday and Thursday this week. I think we should go out to supper tonight as I do not want to cook. Where to go? Swiss chalet? White Spot? Wendys?
So W calls late tonight, S^ still up he talks as he is falling asleep, hands me the phone because W wants to talk to me. She asks if I could cover her on Sunday so she can go away for the day to do an race. Now two weeks ago w said she did not want to do these kind of events because the took her away from her kids, Tonight she was trail running, where the guy she went after just after we split, would be. THE ****. Sorry to vent.
So after seeing him tonight she wants me to cover on her weekend, she does add she is giving me first choice to watch them because two of her friends have said they will watch them. So she does this event, with this OM, and makes me feel guilty if I do not drop my plans to watch them. When I am with the kids I am with the kids, no work, just with the kids, they help me clean the house, whatever I have to do they come along and we have fun. On the weekend I am not with the kids I plan activities to stay very busy, 3-4 hour bhkie rides, long run, gym. Things I cannot/will not do when I am with the kids.
Am I wrong to feel pressured to look after the kids. My work is very busy, lots of pressure and stress,( I sell appliances to large projects, very tight deadlines, with unexpected suprises) and on top of that I have to pay her a lot of money per month. I value my own time and resent the guilt hse has added. Please do not get me wrong I love my kids and would rather be a family than anything else. But I do not want to help my WAW date. Whether she is or not, she says not, but when do you start and stop beliving?
All I would be doing is relaying on Sunday. I did notice that I become agitated if I not de-stress myself.
If I was to hang with the kids on Sunday, I would be thinking about her, and the fun she is having without me.
I love my kids, I miss her but I can not show any weekness.
Do I say no and she send the kids to someone else to watch?
She'll respect you more if you set up appropriate boundaries that allow you to self-care. I wouldn't say no just to keep her away from OM. I'd say no if I noticed I wasn't growing and was feeling resentful or feeling used.
By the way, the OM is inconsequential. This is about you and her.
I agreed to be with the kids on Sunday, game up my plans. What can i do with the kids? I will have a look trough the coming events and find some fun. Having a boy's night out tonight. I am wondering how much trouble I can find. If don't post for a day or two don't worry, the local jail is nice and staffed by the RCMP. How bad could if be?
Hey Russ, Good luck with the move and can I say something??? Don't let her manipulate you like she does. Add some mystery if she asks you to have the kids say Look I love having the kids but I have plans that day that I can't change. If she asks what tell her you have a date that you are looking forward to, if she asks who with just say look I'm sorry but I can't have the kids. Like change the subject. Even if you don't have a date you do as far as she is concerned. She has to believe you are GAL she has to see it not just hear what you are doing. It seems a bit like she is still holding all the cards and you might be letting her. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. As for breaking in the bed well that is up to you. If you can find a buddy for that, that doesn't expect a R maybe it wouldn't hurt but if you think they may be hoping for more than that I would say no. You are not over you W yet and that wouldn't be fair to anyone else. Trust me I am a girl and there aren't too many girls that sleep with someone and don't hope there is more to it but you are the best judge of that. Goodluck with the move again and I will be in touch. Kim x
Well I'm, and I do not think my vias will be the same.
each time I go out I seee something else I should get.
I have had to stop myself now. I have the beds and couch dishes and new appliances.
It is a nice place, I think XW even approves. She dropped the kids off on sunday to go shopping, funny how I like to do small thing like shopping with the kids as apposed to alone. Anyway I got to see the kids and have fun.
Set up thier bunk beds last night and they slept in them till almost 2:00Am, Glad I bought a king bed for me, we all fit.
My son has been drawing pictures of all of us with smiles now as before noone had faces. Wow. They like my new place.
Anyways I'm off to bed, had to put end tables together tonight.
