I'm sticking only with the pics of my kids. I forgot how they were when they were little. Of course they've been cute the entire time (aren't everyone's kids).
Okay, I'll go dark all weekend and through Wednesday next week. It's going to be killer for me.
And of course you are right about divorced and together. Actually when I started at this spot I was anticipating that I'd be divorced and still DBing. So divorced and together I do believe is the 3rd possibility.
Come back tomorrow Jo and say don't call her. Okay?
Happy Easter.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Church was very happy and sad at the same time today. I'm not the best of Christians, but I did get to thinking as I sat through this awesome service that my relationship with God is just like that with my wife, only the exact opposite. He's the one that loves me and I'm the one saying "I don't know you well enough to love you...or ILYBINILWY" If he wasn't God I'm sure I would be a frustration to him. Of course he's patient. He lets me have my whole life to get my head out of my butt and come to him the way he wants. I need that kind of patience. Yes, I had two "don't calls". But I came out of church happy and what I wanted to do was tell her and my S-kids to have a happy Easter. So I left a message on her phone. I have undefined emotions running through me. I really can't tell if I'm happy or sad, but I feel like crying.
Today isn't a day for me to worry about the consequences of anything in my relationship. It was a day I was thankful for the gift God gave me on this day. So it was a day I wish that for my wife. So there
Anyway, country music today has been torturing me. It seems the radio just keeps having applicable songs. I'll share the lyrics of two. I think most here can relate.
First One-Brooks and Dunn. Getting better all the time
I don't stop breathing every time the phone rings My heart don't race when someones at my door I've almost given up thinkin' your ever gonna call I don't believe in magic anymore.
I just don't lie awake at night Asking God would get you off my mind It's getting better all the time It's getting better all the time.
And Blake Shelton's Goodbye time
It's your life - you say you need a change Don't all the dreams we've seen come true mean anything You say it's different now and you keep staring at the door How can you walk away don't I matter anymore
If being free's worth what you leave behind And if it's too late for love to change your mind Then it's goodbye time
If we had known our love would come to this We could have saved our hearts the hurt of wasted years Well it's been fun - what else can I say If the feeling's gone words won't stop you anyway
If being free's worth what you leave behind And if it's too late for love to change your mind Then it's goodbye time
Well I better go get a life. Hope you all had a nice Easter.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Please let me be the first to slap you for posting the words to country songs. <SLAP!> Knock that crap off! That stuff is WAY too depressing for you to be a) listening to and b) sharing it! Okay? JAZZ! NOTHING BUT JAZZ (and NO Sinatra!). Jazz is better when there are no lyrics!
I liked your analogy of God DRing us. That gives me a lot to think about. And it's good that you are spending some time trying to understand your own feelings in all of this. Keep that up. Unfortunately I don't think men learn that skill as boys, and then it comes back to bite you in the butt when you're an adult.
That's for you Martha and your dissing of country music. Maybe I'll have to try jazz though.
So no reply from my wife. She either doesn't have her phone or she does but doesn't want to talk to me. Maybe you were right about not calling. But I wasn't in the mood for DB games today regardless of whether it moved me farther away from my goals.
And speaking of that. When I had my previous setback I told my wife the reason I was distant was because I was just giving her space. She said, but you always do that. You just want space all the time. So I don't think that completely dark is in my best interest. Oh well, I left the message and that's enough for one day.
Well, I guess I better get back to work. And quit worrying about what my wife is doing or thinking. Although I would like to hear what kind of fun things my s-kids are doing. MMMmmmm
TTFN
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Hope, I did my time listening to country. It's just too sad or sometimes too dumb (Prop me up beside the jukebox when I die, etc.). But hey, I dance a mean two-step and I'll take you on ANY time you want, dude! I like George Straight.
Seriously, about the jazz, let me know if you're really interested and I'll recommend some good introductory artists.
I think I'm turning in myself. Only 4 hrs of sleep last night and tons of homework and posting tonight. Blech! Why was it I wanted to go back to grad school? Oh yeah...that little thing called money !
Yes, I'd like you to recommend some good jazz. It says a person lives longer if they listen to different types of music. Although by the ache in my heart tonight I'm not sure why I'd want a longer life to live by myself. Just moping.
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
Why do you suppose this board is always so slow on Monday? No one really seems to even journal on Mondays. Is it because everyone is so depressed that they have to go back to work?
I wasn't going to write because putting down each interaction with my wife just makes it harder. She did call back last night. It was nice. We essentially just talked about what they had been doing on vacation and I gave a little rundown on my day. It was a discussion between friends. I find that I really like being friends with her. Sure I'd like the whole ball of wax, but as long as I don't selfishly focus on how I want more it goes pretty well.
So that's all for now. Just wanted to say 'Hi' and see if there was any life on this board. Does everyone have Monday off?
TTFN
HOPE
In the end, it's not the years in your life that count. It's the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
It is hard to fail, but it is worse never to have tried to succeed. Theodore Roosevelt
I like George Straight.