Thank you Phoenix, your last line has inspired me once again to get back on and keep hanging on to my R and H. Not that I was giving up, I am just tired and running on empty.
Quote: We just have to make sure that where we are is a more comfortable place to be.
I like that, I have to remember that again.
I would love to be on my motorcycle again, but it got old and unreliable and I donated it to a church youth group. So my horse is my motorcycle for me, wind blowing thru my hair. She just doesn't care for it when I get confused and crank her ears to go faster.
Your ups and downs are still just that, but you also seem to be moving things in a positive direction....... Yeah! I look forward to checking in and hearing more.
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
Both motorcycles and horses have a special place in my life. Because of my sitch in life, motorcycles is where I am most experienced. My tie to horses past away a few years back, he put me on my first motorcycle and my first horse, I gave his eulogy. Every time I'm on either, those memories of my uncle comes back everytime I'm on either.
R wise, yes things are slowly improving. Like any long ride, you let yourself be aware on the here and now, but your focus has to be set on the distant road or destination. To keep up my PMA I look at then(bomb) and now as a side by side picture. I also look at the changes she has made and try to picture what I would have to go through to make the same changes if I were in her shoes. At that point I do appreciate the work she has done and that lifts me.
BTW, last night I leaned in for a kiss (got distracted by children) and she finished it. I did not do any end zone victory dances, kept even keel, but I did sleep a little easier last night. So yes, there is progress, but it takes time.
I haven't put on here half of what I've gone through, at the beginning it was rough, but as you can see it is better. At the beginning she had pretty much written me off, now she shares thoughts and experiences with me and asks for my input and help in things. This whole experience is long and hard, but I'm sure I wouldn't buy into it if it wasn't, it would feel like real change. I only want to go through this once, so if it has to be long this time, so be it.
If you can see positives, even small stuff, focus on that for now. Appreciate how these small things can get you to your goal.
