Honey, Thanks, it's Friday and of course it's a day off here. I got your response before I opened my email and low and behold an email from W. To a thick head like me it even seemed to have a hint of friendliness. Take a look. "Things are good here. Rain has finally stopped. Have attended meetings two night this week, i.e., for ballet, confirmation and then shopping with D15(my description) for shoes for her formal. Ballet guild meeting on Saturday, etc., etc., etc. Don't know where the time goes. As far as a purchase for D15 (my description) -- the only thing I would suggest are diamond stud earrings no bigger than 1/4 carat (each earring) otherwise too big for her ear and she won't wear them. Sounds like Dubai is a nice place to visit." Thoughts?
Karen, I'm all for communication but it's hard to shake past accusations like"controlling". From my string you see I've read and counseled a ton but for a guy who most people think is a swashbuckler I feel like I'm gunshy with W. How do I ask questions like "why ..." without her feeling I'm call her on the carpet? TAGIII
I think your sitch is particularly difficult due to the distance. Your W doesn't make it any easier. Have you read the book "Divorce Busting?" - it has a lot of helpful suggestions for communication even in difficult circumstances.
Karen, I've read DB, DR and 12 others. I'm pretty much following the prescription but am tapped out. I don't see progress and Lord knows I'm not a quiter but I can't figure W. Our joint counselor says there is no substitive reason for D nor does the C I visit on my own. I think it's hormones + spinal cord surgery + my years of controlling + she now works in a law office. She's still Polllyanna around our kids and friends and dotes over our D15 as if D15 is the only person in the world. D15 is a great compassionate kid with straight A's in all advanced courses but I see her withdrawing from this D. I dunno, I just wish I could see a sign and move on, either way. Thanks for the insight and bye-the-bye. How do I get this thread to pop up on my "Favorite Threads?" All the best, TAGIII
I know what it is to be tapped out. I have already experienced the big D and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I am sure that I did the right thing in that instance but part of me still wonders if I couldn't have just lived a permanent separation and learned to deal. The funny thing is that my sex drive was a factor in knowing that I couldn't live a permanent separation. I knew that I would eventually want to have sex and for moral reasons I wouldn't just want to take a lover. I have no great suggestions except to read over the archives here - some of these folks are much more helpful than any marriage book.
Thanks Karen, Given you comment about "sex drive was a factor in knowing that I couldn't live a permanent separation"I wonder who's side time is on? Any thought on how I get this thread in my favorites? NOPKins started it and regardless that I check "add" it doesn't add. Thanks again, TAGIII
Quote: Any thought on how I get this thread in my favorites? NOPKins started it and regardless that I check "add" it doesn't add.
Tag, when you're reading on the thread you want to save, are you clicking on the "Favorite Thread" (toggle) link on the bottom, left-hand corner box titled "Extra Information"?
MrsNOP From Geneva with love, I think I did. Just to be safe. After you read this please post something so I don't fall off the posts since I'm 7 hours ahead of the USA right now. Merci,
