I'm glad this thread was bumped up! I don't know how I missed it during my DB surfing. Thank you for sharing so much. My communication with my H is full of the mistakes you used to make. I know I'm going to learn a lot from your experience and advice. Thanks!
You mentioned some tapes "How to Light His Fire" Who are they by? My H has told me a million times that he just needs to know that I love him and feel secure. He's also asked me to just let him love me and take care of him. He's said I don't give him credit and that I'm looking for the negatives and I know that I too set him up at times. Your list of what works and what doesnt work is great!
"Light his fire" is by Ellen Kreidman. IIRC, it wasn't a mind blowing book but it did have a few good tips. For me, the best book for showing h love (aside from DB!) was "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus". It taught me how to show him love but also how to stop tearing him apart. I also appreciated "The Five Love Languages" particularly as it made me think about what made h calm, happy, more giving, etc.
Sage
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
