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Halo, I guess that was a bit of a contradictory statement.

Nitaf

Thanks for stopping by my thread.

Just my $.02, but if the boundaries make you feel better, then that's the most important thing. You have to be happy with you and what you're doing to be happy in the M.

Can I text H and tell him how much I enjoyed Saturday ? was sometimes a sore spot w/u. Is this too pursuing?

Nitaf

I don't think that's too much...sort of along the lines of "I had a nice day with you"--only with some more personal details. But maybe not make the message too long? Just sort of a "Saturday was nice" kind of thing? He'll probably get your meaning.

Hi Nita,
I haven't posted to you before, but I have read some of your thread. It sounds like things are going well.
I have a question. When you went dark for 3 months, who made the initial contact and why?

We always have some type of contact because we have a 10 year old son. I limited myself by letting my S answer phone when H called. S would sometimes say H wants u and I would say tell him I will call back. I would call next day, maybe. I haven't asked a question about his wherabouts im over 3 mos...

He just started to call and linger on the phone. I would always end convo 1st. then 1 day he just text messaged me and asked to see me.....

We will see what is next........

Nitaf

I hope it all works out. Sounds like H is thinking about things. Good luck.

Nitaf, sorry if my words came out somewhat confusing...
What I was trying to say is that yes, things are taking longer but in the long run it seems like it will be worth the wait!

Hi Nitaf, just got a chance to stop by for a sec., it sounds like you are making big progress, although I know it seems like it takes forever and a week, doesnt it?

I'd say go for it....text him and tell him (briefly) that Sat. and was good. One adage I try to keep in mind is that " behavior that's rewarded is repeated"....so, give it a try and see what happens. you can always decide not to go down that tunnel again if it doesnt work well. However, my bet is it will!
hang in...I think you're doing fabulously!
Deb

HI Nitaf,
How are you doing? I'm going to catch up on your sit. You sound like you are doing well. Did you have the honesty convo. w/H? I have some feeling about it, but I can't put my finger on it. Like it's too much talking maybe? I'm not sure. I'll come back to you!
ttyl
karen812