I'm proud of you period. I didn't want you to think that just because I'm hoping Mr. Wonderful's eyes are opened that that affects the way I see you. You rock period! As for him wanting to come back home...if you decide that you want to divorce him anyway, well, I love and respect you enough to know that you are making the right decison for you! I'm just a sucker for happy reunions...so, that's what I'm hoping for...but I'm proud of you for all the growth you've done..and for all you have taught me.
Not sure I'm expressing myself well.
Just wanted you to know there is no pressure from me on a decison either way!
You have been an inspiration me in my dealing with my own Crazymaking.
I just wanted to jump in here.... I hope this all turns out to be the peace that you need and deserve no matter what the outcome. From reading all of your posts, and this recent update you've got it down. You are an inspiration and I will continue to look for your updates and listen to you advice.... Hugs
Glad that my update yesterday brought some smiles around to the BB. PIB, I had to laugh at your clarification, and just want to give you a hug (((PIB))) and tell you I understand what you were saying all along. Hey, as long as we're dispensing thanks, I'll tell you that your insight as to why the fears were present were VERY helpful and kept me focused on what was truly important.
I am going to let Mr. Wonderful sketch out how he feels this reconcilation needs to work ideally for him. I'm not as concerned about me... I've logged way too much time in IC and I have all you guys here. I figure if we can't come up with some solutions to problems that crop up, nobody can!
One thing for sure: we will not be sweeping this under the rug and pretending the past 18 months have not happened. There will need to be a meeting of the minds, as well as the hearts and souls too. We'll see what this looks like as the story unfolds.
I was on my cell phone--talking to one Colorado based BB member (thanks, Linda!)--driving around the streets of my neighborhood when I spotted Mr. W. and the girls traveling the opposite direction. Funny, I knew exactly where they were going... to Applebees.
Saw the car there, hung up with Linda (did you give K a hug for me too?) and walked in the restaurant. D7 saw me first and bubbled with joy... quickly followed by a squeal from D10 and a very happy man who smiled from ear to ear (including his eyes) who exclaimed, "Look! Mom's here! Now she can join us!"
I had dinner with them and it was pretty normal--that is, conversation flowed smoothly and dinner was good. Yes, Triple J, I endured another grilled chicken salad...
Mr. W. was eating his steak caesar salad when he urged D10 to tell me about "the incident" at camp earlier that day... which I discovered another boy had been fondling himself under the table. Fortunately, it was another boy (who is a good friend of D10's) who caught him and told him to knock it off. But D10 in her mouthy ways went over to this kid and said, "If you ever do that again, you little perv, I'll make sure the teacher catches you."
Mr. W. was strongly encouraging her to knock him upside the head...
Anyhoo, true to his word, he took D7 and D10 hopped in the car with me. For the first time since, well, I can't remember, he hovered around my car and chatted. I drove away first, my last glimpse being a man and his daughter waving frantically at us.
That's it for now. I still have lots of stuff to mentally reconcile... and that is not going to be easy.
Oh, and for those of you have followed my weight loss efforts, I'm probably going to reach goal tomorrow. That will total 38 lbs that have gone somewhere else, and I'm now down to my pre-D10 form. And I'm really happy about where I am... mentally, spiritually, emotionally and physically.
I have a lot to be thankful for, regardless of my outcome. I've made some amazing friends here. And you will remain part of me for the rest of my days. Mr. W. is just going to have to get over it and understand that he will be sharing me with even more folks than before. It's who I am, and I'm not willing to negotiate on this one either.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
Betsey I really think you rock! You are one fabulous lady.
You drop the rope and look what happens!
And you had to say that word "Colorado" I miss your state. Haven't been there in years. My H and SS are heading there in September to elk hunt, near Ft. Collins. My H lived in Ft. Collins many years ago with W#1 and still keeps in touch with a friend there. W#2 also lives in Colorado--somewhere.
Wish I were going, except I'd want a cabin in Estes Park for the week!
Well, Cathy, bring your clubs to Estes Park... that's where Mr. Wonderful spent his week last week. He goes every year, and says the course there is spectacular.
There ARE tons of elk there and in Rocky Mountain National Park. You'll be eating well for a few months...
Now, want to come out and teach me how to swing clubs? I promised myself that I would eventually learn how to play. At some point, I will be eating my words. I'm not skilled with a whole lot of hand-eye coordination, so this is a real chore for me.
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I don't pray 'prayers' all that much Bets , but as we were talking this came to me: May the Lord hold you and your family in the palm of His Hand and bless you and keep you.
Now these are interesting developments! You know, while the Mr W you describe sounds like he has (or had) quite a few issues, he does not sound like a complete fool – and only a complete fool would let a woman like you slip through his fingers without a fight. It seems like he’s coming around to realizing that himself.
Whether you still want to build a future with him, or decided it is “too little, too late”, makes no difference to the fact that you’re an amazing person – and as you can see from all the wonderful responses here an inspiration to many.
You’ll know what’s right for your Ds and yourself. GO BETSEY!!!!
Betsey 
I am so proud of you for reaching your weight goal, and I know you look incredibly gorgeous!