MM wrote: When I was reading CaDad's post the other day he described his wife as sweet. This is about the last word you could use to describe me. Cross off gentle, quiet, modest, restrained and sympathetic too. _____________________________
Correction: I said that YOU'D think my W was sweet. She's not to me at all. I'm not being mean, I'm just pointing out that the way our S sees us is not always the way others do.
Jen, you are a handful! You'd be a great debating/sparring partner. (I can see myself insulting more than a few of your books. LOL) Your irreverant humor would be a lot of fun, too. You present your views in an intelligent and forthright manner, and your posts clearly show you to be a good person.
What you don't seem to realize is that any of those qualities that "bug" your H is his problem, not yours. Let me explain what I mean. My W is a "life of the party" type, while I'm the "let's go in the cloakroom and have our own party" type. When we dated, I found her outgoing nature attractive. But when we M, it really started to bug me. One day, I discovered what it was that bugged me. I didn't really care if she was loud or had fun her way. What I objected to was her dragging me into it with her. As long as she didn't try to make me act like her, I didn't care what she did. That way, I got to sit back and laugh with everyone else instead of being in the spotlight with her.
That's what I mean about it being his problem. He has to decide where he wants to be when you're "bigger than life". You shouldn't have to change that.
This probably isn't an issue with you anymore after your 3-fer weekend. But I hope you don't let yourself be bothered with who you are. You impress me as being quite a lady.
I have pretty much gotten over my feeling "unlikeable" phase. My H really is a curmudgeon and much of my "pestiness" is his problem. My mother-in-law has actually apologized to me on numerous occasions for my H's cranky behavior (she blames it on his father). I am usually good humored enough to take his irritability in stride. The sex issue has thrown me off-kilter.
My "larger than life" behavior isn't really about being "the life of the party". I am more along the lines of some zany boss or teacher who makes everyone do someone else's job for a couple days or teaches math by making the kids form shapes on the football field. I like public speaking but hate cocktail parties. My current fantasy is to save up enough money so that I can hire a crew of young muscle to turn my yard into the most bizarrely beautiful garden. Boredom is the WORST thing in the world for me.
Quote: This probably isn't an issue with you anymore after your 3-fer weekend
My H referred to himself as "the new me" a couple times this weekend. I really, really like the new him. I just hope it lasts.
P.S. I am ordering a new bumper sticker that says "Democrats are sexier. Who ever heard of a great piece of elephant?"LOL
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
MM wrote: I am ordering a new bumper sticker that says "Democrats are sexier. Who ever heard of a great piece of elephant?"LOL ___________________________
You can park next to my truck. My bumper sticker says, "Republicans are better equipped for sex. Want to see my trunk?"
When we dated, I found her outgoing nature attractive. But when we M, it really started to bug me. One day, I discovered what it was that bugged me. I didn't really care if she was loud or had fun her way. What I objected to was her dragging me into it with her. As long as she didn't try to make me act like her, I didn't care what she did. That way, I got to sit back and laugh with everyone else instead of being in the spotlight with her.
