OMG...she really IS an evil paperdoll. WTF is up with that? Just keep repeating to yourself: This is HER problem, not mine, This is HER problem, not mine....
And don't go out an buy her a copy of PM. That's very fused-up. Also, don't stop writing personal notes in your copy.
I'm really sorry to hear this...but I have to tell you: When it sounds 'too good to be true' it usually is.
Hairdog - whose W is not an evil paperdoll, but wait...what's that behind the door? OMG....It's...it's...aaaaaaughghghghg!
Something about your post makes me think that either your wife is very childish or for some reason she views you as a figure of authority against whom she has to rebel.
Shades of the "evil paperdoll" returning. I didn't mean to insult you with that comment. I was being overly analytical and not very empathetic (I've got an appointment in 2 weeks tosee if I have ADD ).
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
HD, I just don't feel right about posting LOL to eveything you write. But I do appreciate your sense of humor.
And methinks MM needs to "hold onto herself" about the insults. She'll never forgive me for being a Republican. It has nothing to do with ADD (unless that means Acute Democrat Discriminator).
Was hoping that the healing could start for your R, but guess not right now. She has to want to makes changes, even small ones and they cannot be forced or coerced. You are trying, so keep doing your part. I hope she sees the light soon.
Quote: And methinks MM needs to "hold onto herself" about the insults. She'll never forgive me for being a Republican. It has nothing to do with ADD (unless that means Acute Democrat Discriminator).
Actually, I'm not a registered Democrat. I prefer to think of myself as a Compassionate Libertarian. I've decided to upgrade your wife from "evil paperdoll" to "evil china doll" (almost three dimensional but very cold and hollow).
Hairdog,
I've stereotyped your wife as a type I call "literal feminists". They've got all the rules down pat, but can't quite get into the "goddess spirit". My sister-in-law is one of these and her ex-husband was rendered utterly ball-free until she had an affair because he wasn't giving her quite enough attention. I hear he's quite happy now.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
Wondering how she will feel when those huge arms go to strangle her neck...sigh. her ambivalence and need to disappoint are merely part of the process, not the end of it.
Ok, I'm going to go against the crowd here and say, Who cares? So she lied about reading your book. The changes are still positive right? You still felt closer to her than you had in 22 years right?
So why the focus on her (really dumb) lie? Just tell her it's no big deal and that you would be glad to pick up a copy for her if she wants one. Obviously her curiosity got the best of her and she must have LIKED what little she read or her response would not have been so good. She is (was?) being affectionate so I would say that this is a GOOD development!
She is backtracking now because she feels awkward for telling such a silly lie and getting caught. Also she expects that you expect her to do this so she is. Did that make sense, lol. Michele talks extensively about this...whatever you expect, you will get.
I would continue to be upbeat with her and encourage her to read your book anytime she wants. Also move in for more affection and see if she reciprocates.
In my opinion this is a good thing! You've not only got her curiosity up but your changes have also prompted some affection in her..it's all good!!
I learned early in the PM process that "any" movement is a sign of progress as weird as it might be. Eacmple, my W recently got overly drunk at a neighborhood event which is strange for her. A week later, she reciprocated a deep kiss with a stranger at a bar right in front of me. I even had some weird weeks during this process. I think it's natural during a growth phase to behave in really bizarre ways. It might be something we do to "shock" ourselves out of the heavy covers of who we know ourselves to be and into a state of movement. It's just a strange way to remind ourselves that we can do whatever we want...good or bad and that our patterns can be broken out of.
Also, I shouldn't care or pay attention to this, but something is going on right now with my W. I'm not psychic but I can see it in her eyes. Not sure what it is but it feels like some more movement is about to happen.
Anywhere is walking distance if you have the time
-Steven Wright
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