Hey Sandi. I am recovering. My grandbaby is pure medicine.. She just makes me feel so loved... She has seen me about 6 times since I got home.. Spends the day with me. Blood Pressure is down about 20 psi across the board. My complexion is better according to people. Not as red as before in the face. My wife is definitely more concerned with me now, worry's and texts or calls if she doesn't hear from me more than a day. Went back to work yesterday, non eventful. Its a small satellite office from the big one up in VA, so everyone was checking on me. Havent done much divorcebusting.. Just trying to figure out how to eat different, prep for COVID 19 craziness. Got plenty of TP and wipes, lol. I have a new perspective on life.. I have gone out a couple of times for dinner, by myself. Put some nice dirty cologne on, nicer than normal clothes, and just conversed with other people. Nice. My youngest is really more attentive to me, maybe because she was explained how serious a LDA of 99% blockage is.
Hey, Got a deep question. I heard through the grapevine, someone may have details on my wifes affair , the EA she had. Would it be wise to seek out this information or just let it go? These two are not friends anymore, as they parted ways about 2 years ago after a work related indifference..
Hey, Got a deep question. I heard through the grapevine, someone may have details on my wifes affair , the EA she had. Would it be wise to seek out this information or just let it go? These two are not friends anymore, as they parted ways about 2 years ago after a work related indifference..
I am not what they would call a veteran around here. But question I would ask you, what do you think that is going to do for you that would be positive? Just my 2 cents, nothing good will come from it and will likely just leave you with more question you may never get the answer to.
I haven't read your whole sitch. Usually, "No", because focusing on your ex doesn't help you detach.
It may be different if you'd change your actions based on what you learned--e.g., if crossing some line were a firm deal-breaker. More often I see people here convince themselves they need to find out because it would be a deal-breaker, then they backtrack, and all they've done is shoot themselves in the foot.
Thnx everyone. I will take your advice and forgo the history of her past while separated etc. I would like to say the book, divorce remedy is spot on on so many levels. Wish I had this right before I was married. Would have made life and my marriage to her much much better.
I heard through the grapevine, someone may have details on my wifes affair , the EA she had. Would it be wise to seek out this information or just let it go? These two are not friends anymore, as they parted ways about 2 years ago after a work related indifference..
Do you feel you need details of her EA? If so, why? Are you trying to find out if it was really a PA, and if so, would it matter to you now, or change what you are currently doing? In other words, would you be able to let her go, or would it only serve to hurt you more?
I'm sure that many betrayed spouses disagree with me about needing to know all the details of their wayward spouse's affair, but when it comes to intimate details.......I think too much information about them having sex can be damaging. How do you unsee that picture in your brain? Every time you started to have sex with your spouse, guess what picture would pop up in your brain? I could understand wanting to know if she lied about her whereabouts, or something of that nature, if deciding to reconcile or go separate ways.....or for your own peace of mind, if knowing will bring peace of mind. I'm just not in favor of sharing information about their favorite sexual positions, or what all they tried. Know what I mean? Of course, you say your W had an EA, so I guess they didn't have skin on skin sex. Which leads my back to the question of why do you need to hear the details?
Is this ex-friend of your W's a woman? She may be more than willing to spill the tea on your W, but I tell LBH's not to trust a female friend....nor a female ex-friend of his WW. Since this friend may have an ax to grind, how would you know what to believe? I suggest you think long & hard before discussing your W's activities with a previous co-worker.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
Your right Sandi. I dont need to know any more. My wife and I are getting along pretty well right now. Her ex friend is a female friend, and they did part ways unhappily. She caused allot of flack and their place of business.. I am just going forward. Using the book, divorce remedy as guidance. Some of the books is so spot on , its scary this isnt put into peoples hands the day they get engaged.
