Running Club met yesterday, but their start time was a bit later for me than I wanted, so I went out and ran on my own for 20 minutes around the school’s track and campus. Also did 30 push-ups and 30 butterfly sit-ups later at home while grilling dinner.
So far, so good with running—I feel pretty good. I’m sure some of this can be because of the following factors:
*Pacing myself (and not going full-throttle) *Weather warming up (yes, it’s SoCal, so it’s usually warmer than most other places) *Staying better-hydrated (This was a New Year’s Resolution from last year that I’ve become much more intentional about over the last 6-8 months. I try to drink a full-size Nalgene or 750 ml water bottle each day, at least. I also like to fill up one of those water bottles with ice, place a slice of fruit from a lemon, a lime, or a piece of pineapple at the bottom of it, and drink the ‘meltwater’ from it throughout the day. I’m sure it’s also helped with weight loss—I keep my stomach filled, and the water flushes out a lot of the garbage in my system.)
Will go for a run after school and do the sit-ups and push-ups.
Heard back about the young-adult sports—my contact texted me last night. There is a spot available on a team that I can link up with—I just need to check the league’s schedule of games to see how it fits with what I have going on. Even if I can only do a couple of games, I’ll count it as a win.
Looking forward to tomorrow’s hockey game in Downtown LA (Kings / Blackhawks). Very few things like a hockey game in-person, and honestly, my first since my bachelor party in Columbus, OH before getting married. W asked me last night at dinner what time I would need to leave on Saturday, and I told her I’d check (supposed to rain tomorrow, but doesn’t seem like a terrible drive time-wise by SoCal standards as I looked last night). OS asked about the hockey game, and he sounded very excited, and I told him that I should take him to one at some point. In Orange County, we have the Anaheim Ducks, which are closer....but I would be more attached to the Kings (unless I can see my favorite St. Louis Blues play if / when they come into town then heck yeah doesn’t matter what team’s games I go to).
30 push-ups and 30 butterfly sit-ups while I was out grilling dinner tonight
Good! If you want to mix it up a little try "hand release" pushups. You lower yourself all the way down, lift your hands off the ground a little and then press back up again. More taxing than regular pushups.
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“She has every right to move out of the current residence. But until there is a Court Order in place, she has no superior right to have the boys than you do....You can agree to the schedule she is proposing on a trial basis if she moves out. You just don’t agree to the overly comprehensive agreement she presented you with.”
Great, next time she threatens it you might let her know you talked to your L and that she has no right to take them. I think she would be less inclined to follow through if she knows you already have a L and have researched it.
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I won’t tell her this (unless she already knows but is playing dumb / ignorant), but L told me that in the D process, assets / obligations all get split as CA is community property. That also includes her federal pension and her retirement account—the one that is twice the size of mine.
Well, unless she already had that account before you were married. Technically only what she has paid in and earned in interest AFTER the M is subject to 50-50 split. If she started the account after M then yes, it's all subject to splitting, but if she had it before, then it can get pretty complicated trying to sort out what part of it gets split. My ex and I both had 401K's before M and we didn't even try to figure it out because it would have been very difficult. We had it written into the D decree that we would both keep our separate 401k's.
Tell her "I have plans," or be the bigger man / parent and take care of myself and boys whereas she needed help?
Gut says channel R2C and say I have plans.
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Bo, I'm going to be harsh. I suspect many won't agree with me, so please take it with a grain of salt.
If you're looking for a "play" why are you even married. That's not a partnership. W has asked you in advance with plenty of notice in what you have presented as a respectful manner. She's not trying to upend your life with a last-minute assumption that you will bend to her wish.
So I vote you answer honestly. If you don't have plans, then I think it's fair to say, "Thanks for the advanced notice, W - I appreciate that. It looks like I'm free so I'll be sure to keep it set aside for the kids".This shows that your priority is your children and that it always will be.
I say respond to respect with respect. If you have any desire that the two of you will ever be able to turn this around or even coparent amicably you have to play fair back. Only play a fake "I'm busy" card if W is trying to bully you.
