Seven is a good number. You may have just convinced me to bid on a gameworn jersey I was looking at on E-Bay this morning of a hockey player who wears number 7.
Merrick, Yikes your right on buddy, This is where mine got really weird with the bedromm and wanting me out. Good memorey. The guilt trip about no sleep, ect... Wow is all I can say. I honestly believe the methodical planning was going on at this point also in my sitch. Sooooo with that said I would guess the crap will hit the fan in about 3 weeks to a month. Put a mark on your calander. Sorry I havnt been around much, just been busy. Even now just got back from a business trip to Ohio, lucky I made it home the airports were pretty messed up. Going to get some sleep, running a half marathon on Sunday morning, and I am back in the house in the morning. Talk to you soon. God Bless, Eddy
I don't know if your a Christian or how strong your faith is in God. I just wanted to share with you that I was a WAW. I was so hurt and angry. I was not a nice person and very cold to my husband. He had followed what he read and used info from one of the seminars Michelle had a year ago or so. Believe me his positive attitude pissed me off and confused me. I was angry that he was changing things about himself when I decided I wanted out. I'm sure she notices that your trying. Don't give up. For me ,God showed me it would not be easy if I chose divorce. I began to turn back to God and He softened my heart so I could fall apart and break out of that shell I put around my heart. The hardest thing for me is when I realized there was a love deep inside for my husband despite the affairs I had. I knew deep inside if I left I just might regret it after all we started out as best friends. I'll pray for you that things turn around for the better. I don't know if what I wrote was of any help, I skimmed through some of what you posted and just seeing that your wife was so distant/cold reminded me of myself. Sorry for rambling.
notearsovrme - your post ment alot to me and did give me some insight into looking at my WAW. She also noticed how I started improving myself after reading DB and even then she seemed to pull away even more - (very confusing)
Your post did give me some encouragement. As a WAW I would appreciate it if you would check back on my sitch for some further insight.
First, I was very happy to hear what was happening in my friend U'Dog's sitch and needed it to offset my M's ongoing demise. But, every sitch is different, and my needs are different than hers right now.
For me, I've commenced building my detachment fortress. I just don't give a rip right now.
1) I resisted two pleas from W this weekend for me to sleep in the den. She says she is tired and can't be a good mother, but I will not allow that "good mother" crap to be used against me anymore. I just said you're free to sleep with me and I won't touch you.
2) I've also done something I never thought I would ever do--I stopped wearing my wedding ring. I've thought about wearing it on my right hand because my M is dead and may wear it while I'm at work, but I will no longer wear it around W and may even just leave it on my end table when I go out at nights. My wearing it is just a reminder to her that I'm keeping the faith. I'm STILL keeping it, but not in her face.
3) I have my legal strategy in place to respond to her lawyers first separation salvo--which should throw her and her lawyer off guard. Basically some stipulations about W's SoM and a hint of what I intend to spend on legalk fees if necessary (actually, W's lawyer may salivate! ). If W's wants this, it will not be free. (As a joke, I though about contacting OM's Dad--who is OM's boss and $$$ pipeline. I thought I would send him some of his son's notes to W--and say that since OM is willing to go through anything to be with her and make W happy, would he mind contributing $3,000 a month to our split household?) .
4) I have made absolutely no effort to do anything out of the ordinary for her. Rather than kill her with kindness, my attitude is one of complete indifference.
5) I'm scheduling a meeting with the Monsignor of my Church on annulments. For me to move forward, I need to know that I can remarry in the Church. I'll ask him if I should invite my wife--but I don't know if that would just be emotional blackmail on my part. In any event, I hope to get more spiritual cousneling on how to move forward.
It's hard to see how this will play out. On Friday night, W went out and I was watching some stuff on EWTN (Catholic TV) and fell asleep. W saw this when she got home, woke me up, pulled my glasses off my head and said my viewing habits were a f***ing joke. This morning, she tried to tell me that she was mad that I considered myself the victim in D and that her life would be miserable just as much as mine. I just said, "That's right--our lives will be miserable," and I walked away to her taunting me about my walking away."
Later in the day, she got mad at the kids for leaving a mess and started screaming at them at the top of her lungs--just as her mother was walking in! Nice scene.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not acting spitefully or looking for ways to upset. Au contraire, I still act kindly when we are forced to interact. I just simply will not initiate contact and will take care of my needs without worrying about how she will react. Oops, I'm rambling again. Have a great week everybody.
Merrick you amaze me with your strength and determination to keep smiling and have your sense of humor intact while your W just keeps throughing this barrage of crap at you. I realize now that your W is only trying, just like mine, to get a reaction out of you. Its like she is so indulged in getting you to fall of your wagon, so she can say, "see I told you he was no good". Everytime she does something nasty she expects you to snap and give it back, but instead you just keep on smiling and taking care of your family. Your so good and supportive for your family and have become such a huge pillar to keep it together for them, So she raises the bar to try and get you in another way and it just keeps getting worse as everytime she raises it more and more. Its like the Roadrunner and coyotte, the coyotte trys so hard to piss off the roadrunner and he just keeps going, unfazed by the coyotte's antics, The coyotte keeps getting bigger bombs and nastier ideas to beat the roadrunner, only to keep loosing his temper more and more as the RR gets away everytime. He never wins but is obsessed with making the Rr life miserable, while not realizing he is the fool, and the one that is most unhappy. Man these WAWs sure are funny sometimes. Keep on fighting the good fight. God Bless, Eddy
Put a mark on your calander. 
Sorry I havnt been around much, just been busy. Even now just got back from a business trip to Ohio, lucky I made it home the airports were pretty messed up. Going to get some sleep, running a half marathon on Sunday morning, and I am back in the house in the morning. Talk to you soon. God Bless, Eddy 
). If W's wants this, it will not be free. (As a joke, I though about contacting OM's Dad--who is OM's boss and $$$ pipeline. I thought I would send him some of his son's notes to W--and say that since OM is willing to go through anything to be with her and make W happy, would he mind contributing $3,000 a month to our split household?) 